Whether you desire a career in journalism, a trip to China, or a relationship with a wonderful man, your dreams are never out of reach. As long as you work hard and never cease believing in yourself, you can achieve anything you aspire to. Rest assured, on the road to success, you will experience setbacks along the way that'll test your mettle. The key is never allowing such challenges to faze you. When you want something badly enough, nothing or no one can get in your way. Unfortunately, our own negative thinking is often the single biggest obstacle we're up against. For example, you might feel tempted to throw in the towel because: You're hard up on cash. You've applied for several promising jobs and seem to fall short each time. You've had bad luck with a string of recent dates, convincing you that you'll never find true love. Instead of calling it quits, why not use such struggles to drive you to work harder? Maybe you need to get somet...

Many people feel that if they're unsuccessful at something, they've failed -- not just themselves, but others as well. They take a defeatist attitude, convincing themselves that they're losers. They second-guess their decisions.  They beat themselves up over not trying hard enough.  They tell themselves that if only they had said this or done that, they might have prevailed.  I'm here to tell you this:  You don't lose. You either win, or you learn. For example, maybe you didn't get the job, but you realize you can polish your resume a bit and work on improving your interviewing skills. Perhaps you made a couple of uncouth remarks on your blind date that are likely to blame for the fact you never heard from the person again. This shows you that thinking before you speak might be something to shoot for.  Or, maybe you failed an exam you assumed you could pass by cramming for a few hours the night before, demonstrating how importan...

Studies show that our criteria for measuring success is markedly different now than it was several years ago. In the past, we typically perceived someone as successful if they boasted possessions that signaled wealth (e.g., car, big house, fancy watch) and appeared to have loads of free time on their hands. We assumed it meant that their net worth was such that they had no real need to work hard. In our minds, they likely spent more time sunbathing in the Caribbean than churning out reports in the office. However, the benchmarks we use to measure success have evolved over time -- not so much when it comes to material possessions, but in terms of overall lifestyle and work ethic. Studies suggest that we are now more likely to perceive someone as being successful if they have little to no time available for leisurely pursuits due to the many responsibilities they shoulder. For example, let's say Joe works 60 hours a week, has kids, and volunteers at a local non-profit. He h...

The happiest people aren't those who have the best of everything . If that were the case, you would never see millionaire athletes and celebrities getting into crippling debt, being arrested for drugs or driving drunk, settling nasty divorces with their spouses, or, in the worst cases, committing suicide. Instead, the happiest people make the best of everything they have.  The key to being happy is striking the right balance between the desire to acquire more and achieving a state of contentedness with what you already hold in your possession. Some people can't help themselves. They want a brand new car every year or two. They want the latest iPhone as soon as it comes out, even if their version still works perfectly. I'm the polar opposite: I use things until they're almost falling apart. I held on to my last car for 10 years, and it still pained me to part with it. The only thing that prompted me to sell it was the fact it was mysteriously hydroplaning in ...

Life is too short not to do what makes you happy -- whether it's reading, writing, painting, dancing, fishing, diving, mall hopping, watching movies, preaching the Gospel, going to sporting events, traveling, playing catch with your kids, fixing cars, hitting up museums, and the like. We've all heard the expression, "Do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life." I realize not all of us are fortunate enough to work in careers we love. Maybe we have to stay in our jobs to support our families. Perhaps we're at a point where starting over would mean going back to school, which isn't financially feasible. Or, chances are that what we love to do doesn't pay a livable wage. Luckily, we can do what we love on the side while keeping our full-time job. Indulge your creative bent by writing on a freelance basis. Enroll in a painting or guitar class at your local community college. Use your time after work to finally get that pastry busines...

I recently stumbled upon this perspicacious quote by 18th century essayist and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882): "The only person you're destined to become is the person you decide to be." Let's stop for a moment and acknowledge the undeniable truthfulness contained in this one statement. Essentially, Emerson is saying that you are in the driver's seat. You are manning the ship otherwise known as your life, and the direction you take the ship in is of your choosing. Your will is your meal ticket. Whether you wish to be raking in the big bucks as a businessman; making a big difference in the community as a teacher; or simply living a quiet, unassuming life by the lake, you can fulfill your dreams so long as you: Work hard Believe in yourself Resist other's efforts to impose their views and opinions on you, and  Never give up Do things always turn out exactly as we planned? Obviously not. But part of the deal is navigating the vagari...

When life knocks you down, refuse to give up. Get back on your feet and hit it back -- and go for nothing short of the jugular! You're in the driver's seat of your life. Never let other people -- or circumstances over which you may have little to no control -- get in the way of your happiness. Life is too short not to fight for what you want. Life is too short to throw in the towel anytime something doesn't go as planned -- whether you didn't get the job or the girl. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, focus your energies on what lies ahead. Instead of thinking that you missed out, consider that even better opportunities are in the offing. Maybe all it takes is to work a little harder and fine-tune your approach. If something bothers you too much -- if it has you down in the dumps -- it's because you're letting it have control over your thoughts and feelings. Don't let anything negative hold so much sway over you! For example, let's say someon...

In the U.S., most people consider Memorial Day weekend the unofficial start of summer. And rightfully so. This time of year, people hit the beach in droves, take exciting vacations, and fire up the barbecue virtually every weekend. It's hard to believe that today is the last day of the month of May. It feels like it was only yesterday that we were celebrating Cinco de Mayo and, more recently, Mother's Day. Hopefully, you found May a productive month and managed to achieve one or more goals, if not inch closer to that end. If May was nothing to write home about -- maybe you didn't land that job you wanted, got dumped, or had to deal with a lot of crap at work -- you're certainly not alone. A new month means being able to press the Reset button and start with a clean slate. Whatever your goals, here's the chance to work even harder than you did last month toward accomplishing them. Whatever your passions, June presents a fresh opportunity to indulge them...

Everyone likes a little pat on the back for a job well done -- whether from your boss for completing a report on deadline, your spouse for building that time-consuming playhouse for the kids, or your friend for helping organize their party. Sometimes, though, this form of positive reinforcement can be hard to come by. And even if you do fish for compliments or credit in a subtle way, you don't end up getting any. So what do you do in a situation like this? You keep working hard. No one will ever be prouder of your accomplishments than you. If you can't get others to acknowledge your efforts, there's no harm in taking pride in them yourself. If it gets to the point where you feel you're being taken for granted, have a talk with your boss, partner, or friend and let them know your hard work often goes overlooked. If that fails to bear any fruit, it may be time to assess whether the job, relationship, or friendship in question is really worth keeping. Once it...

The things we value most are those we have to work hard to obtain or achieve. If someone were to hand you a trophy with your name and "world's best swimmer" engraved on it when you couldn't swim to save your life, would it mean anything to you? Of course not. You didn't earn it, so it holds no value. If losing weight were as easy as waving a magic wand, do you think one would still feel the same sense of accomplishment as they would upon completing an intense weight-loss program? Not at all. It's one thing to get something done -- it's another to overcome an arduous challenge that tests our patience and mettle. There's a reason most people blow their diets and New Year's resolutions and fail to get through law school and Ph.D. programs. When the going gets tough, many people buckle under the pressure and give up. That's precisely why reaching the finish line can be so gratifying. If something comes too easy, though, we tend not to a...

There's a saying that one should always work to live, not live to work, and I wholeheartedly agree. In our deathbed, we won't be saying, Gee, if only I had worked more, I would have had a much more fulfilling life." Instead, a happy life is measured by memorable experiences and time spent with loved ones. Yes, promotions and other personal accomplishments make us feel good about ourselves, but will they figure prominently in the legacy we leave behind? Probably not. That's why we shouldn't let our jobs overtax us. It's fine to work hard, but not to the point of losing a lot of sleep and having it interfere with our personal lives. Once work trickles into your marriage/relationship and prevents you from enjoying life outside of work --whether that means playing with your kids or hanging out with friends -- that's when you know you may have to tone it down or get another job. It may be that you're single and love your job so much that you don'...