We all know how easily toxic people -- with their knack for negativity and gossip -- can throw a monkey wrench into our days.  But what if we leveraged that toxicity to our benefit? How, you ask? There's a myriad of ways to do this. Among them are these:  1. When they say you can't accomplish something, do you let their words derail your hopes and dreams? No, you use them to further  fuel your motivation to accomplish your goals. After all, who are they to judge? 2. When they criticize you for your style of dress, interests, or any other facet of your personality, do you scramble to change? No, you double down on preserving what makes you unique, which in turn will build self-confidence and boost your self-esteem. 2. When they disrespect you, whether by spewing outright lies or demeaning your character, do you turn around and do the same to them? No, you're better than that. You stand up for yourself, firmly if civilly, without hurling insults. This will equip you with th...

Here's a big relationship no-no: Never hook up with Someone who only values your looks, bank account, or both.  I know what you're thinking: With some people, this isn't easy to tell in the beginning being that they can do a great job of masking their real intentions.  For example, you may have once dated someone whose penchant for gold-digging may not have become evident until two years after you began dating. Or, you may not have picked up on your boyfriend's aim to use you for only one thing until after the honeymoon phase passed. Fair enough.  Some individuals can be awfully deceptive. But as soon as they show their true colors, I implore you not to wait until they change (which is unlikely to happen) -- let alone embark to change them yourself. Just end it -- plain and simple -- before you become any more invested.  A partner worth keeping is one who covets what lies beneath more than they do the superficial. And that's because what lies deep within is what mak...

If you sense that you're worthless to someone, don't fret. Smile, because you're priceless to someone else! To the world you may be just a tiny, insignificant speck. But to one person, you may be nothing less than the world. Even though we might have good,  caring people in our lives, many of us become preoccupied with the ones who treat us like dirt. We go to great lengths to rationalize why they're behaving this way, especially if we can't put a finger on what we ever did wrong. We let their mood sour ours. We call and text them numerous times in the vain hope that they will give us the time of day. In short. we let them get the best of us -- but why should we? Your value doesn't decrease just because someone is unable to see your worth. And just because someone perceives you as being of little worth doesn't mean others see you that way. In fact, if you have friends, family, and/or a partner who count you among the most important people ...

Has anyone -- whether it be your partner, friend, relative, neighbor, or boss -- done you wrong this year? If so, heed this important end-of-year tip: Let it go . Start 2019 with a clean slate. Don't carry other people's drama and negativity with you into the new year. Let your hopes and dreams crowd out your fears and worries. Sure, we can never rid ourselves of all our concerns, but why not start the new year on a high note? If you can't excise from your life the people bringing you grief, e.g., your toxic boss, make it a New Year's resolution not to get hung up on their every word or move. Refuse to allow these people to sour your mood, lower your self-esteem, and eat away at your mental well-being. If we're not careful, we can become trapped in a vicious circle of questioning people's motives, possibly blaming ourselves in the process: Why did they yell at me over the phone? Why haven't they answered my texts? Why did they seem to ...

Some of the people in your inner circle -- whether friends, coworkers, or acquaintances -- may attempt to convince you that they know what's best for you, even if you beg to differ.  In essence, they're saying that they know you better than you know yourself! This is, of course, utterly preposterous.  No one but you knows all your fears, misgivings, hopes, and dreams. No one other than you has been at your side 24 hours a day, seven days a week, every single day of your life.  While your parents, siblings, or friends are likely to have taught you a few valuable lessons as you've gotten older, there are others you've learned through personal experience.  That being said, how can a person claim to have a better handle on you than, well, you? Be wary of these people, I tell you, for they aim to foist their own beliefs and opinions on you as if they were the law.  Whatever you do, do not cave. People do this for one simple reason:...

I came across the following quote earlier this week while browsing the web: "What people think of you is none of your business." When I started to analyze the quote more carefully, I realized that there's a lot of truth to it. Sure, we all want to know what others think of us so that we can manage our reputation accordingly, including dispelling any misconceptions they may have about us. But that doesn't necessarily mean that you should change anything about yourself based on information you dig up. Regardless of what they think of you, if you're happy with yourself, that's all that matters . If you're not entirely happy with yourself and think they have a point -- whether it's that you should talk more during meetings or not talk over people in conversation  -- there's no harm in working to improve yourself in those areas. I want people to regard me as an intelligent man, so if I were to discover that they think otherwise, would I take o...

Today's quote of the day comes from Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962), who served as First Lady of the United States during her husband Franklin Delano Roosevelt's unprecedented four terms in office. "In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility." - Eleanor Roosevelt I agree wholeheartedly with Roosevelt; in reality, this has been a recurring theme on this blog since it was first launched. What I think Eleanor Roosevelt is trying to say here is that we are ultimately the masters of our own destiny. Life is what we make of it, and the world is our oyster. Whether you often complain about your dead-end job, big gut, or shabby city apartment, it's on you to take the necessary steps in your life to effect change. Simply put, no one else is going to do it for you! We must hold ourselves accountable for our choices, whether they end up being good or bad...

Ah, there's nothing like the start of a new year, right? It's an opportunity to start anew. A clean slate. A chance to strive for greatness yet again. Research suggests that, generally speaking, people don't come around to meeting -- and, in some cases, even working toward -- their New Year's resolutions. Why is it that we place such a great emphasis on pressing the reset button on January 1 and becoming a better version of ourselves when, in most cases, we fall short? I surmise that we do it for the following reason: Life is nothing short of unpredictable, and we truly don't know what may lie ahead in the coming year. Thus, making New Year's resolutions give us the sense that we're at least partly in control of our lives. We first look at our shortcomings and the toughest challenges we faced in the outgoing year and convince ourselves that, with a little time and effort, we can triumph over even the longest odds. For example, let's say you l...