Whether it's a cheating spouse, a friend who takes you for granted, or a coworker who stabs you in the back whenever you're not present, no one should make excuses for another person's unsavory behavior. If the person is making a genuine effort to clean up their act, that's one thing. But if they pledge they're going to change, and yet you catch them pulling the same stunts over and over again, they're making a mockery of your compassion. At that point, you have to decide whether to continue giving them the benefit of the doubt, or calling it quits once and for all. It isn't as easy to walk when you're dealing with a coworker and you wish to keep your job. In that case, you may consider asking for a transfer or moving to a cubicle further away from the individual. You might also think twice about ending the friendship if you each have mutual friends. You may worry that he or she will talk smack to the others about you (if they haven't alr...

One thing is for people to blather on about the drama in their lives. Another is for them to try to whip up drama in ours. The latter is wholly unacceptable, and we should never stand for that. Whether it's a coworker who tries to turn you against someone at work who doesn't rub her the right way, someone you've begun dating who hasn't quite broken up with their ex, or a friend who tries to rope you into gambling or taking drugs, you should never take the bait. Never allow yourself to get wrapped up in other people's problems. While you certainly can lend a hand, their worries should not become your own. They have to resolve such matters themselves and leave you out of it -- otherwise, you may find yourself shouldering a heavy burden. Many people who find themselves down on their luck are so selfish as to try to bring others down with them, especially if the latter seem to be doing pretty well for themselves. Misery loves company, to be sure. In the worst ...

The worst type of pain is not inflicted by the people we can't stand (i.e, our "enemies"), but by the people we care about the most. For example, if you haven't been able to stand your boss from day one, the fact that he was a rude jerk today probably doesn't come as a surprise. The same goes for meddling in-laws, the persistent bully at school, or the obnoxious neighbor who's never rubbed you the right way. Yet, when our partner, trusted friend of 20 years, or doting relative does us wrong, it can be devastating. We might feel as though we've been hit by a train moving at breakneck speed.  Imagine finding out that your boyfriend has been cheating on you for years. Or that your closest friend has been spreading rumors about you to others within your circle. Or, picture discovering that your coworker has been taking credit for your ideas at work.  We never see this deception coming when it concerns people in whom we have placed our tru...

I sit next to a guy at work who's as punctual as they come; he comes in, eats lunch, and leaves at the same time every single day -- without fail. When it's time to close up shop, we usually leave at just about the same time. (Have to beat that traffic, you know?) As I shut down my computer and gather my things, I've made a habit of telling him, "It's time to " skedaddle ." A cursory dictionary search yields the following definition: "to depart quickly or hurriedly; run away." My coworker has grown so fond of the word that he frequently uses it himself. In other cases, I might say, rather exaggeratedly, "time to make a mad dash for the door," or "time to schlep out of here." What endeared me to "skedaddle" is that it's such a fun, funky-sounding word.  Speaking of that coworker who sits next to me, he has his own quirky sense of humor, often substituting "goodbye" with "Me...

Many people show more interest in other people when they're not around than when they are. We all have that coworker who may not talk to us for days at work, but somehow they notice when we're not there and proceed to inquire about it. Many of us have been in a relationship where the other person takes us for granted -- until we begin to show signs of getting fed up and cease putting in as much time and effort. Then there's the friend who only seems to care about the friendship once you've stopped calling and visiting them. If we want people to appreciate us, we have no choice but to force them to invest time and effort in us too -- not just the other way around. By doing so, the individual realizes that if they're taking their spare time to do something for us, they must truly care about us. The tendency to take others for granted is a theme I've broached in myriad posts on the blog. I understand that we get busy, and being unable to answer every ...

Whether it’s a troublesome co-worker, jaded ex-girlfriend, or argumentative friend, we’re often around people who send our blood pressure shooting through the roof or push us to the brink of a nervous breakdown. For your health’s sake, however, it’d probably be best to avoid such an individual whenever possible and resolve to be in the presence of those who instead fill your life with positive energy. At some point in our lives, we’ve all encountered a “bad egg” who makes our lives miserable.  Most of us have had at least one obnoxious co-worker who we’d love to give the finger to and shut out of our lives forever.  In my case, I’ve worked with supervisors and co-workers who bring their personal issues – say, their marital or financial woes – to the workplace and take their frustrations out on unsuspecting employees. It goes without saying that these people are like an albatross hanging around your neck. And it isn’t as if we can simply cut ties with our boss or co-workers...

Whether it's your mother-in-law, coworker, or neighbor, we each know someone who can't help but be a little nosy. The phrase "mind your own business" seems to have been invented specifically for these folks. They like drama, dirt, the juicy stuff. Though all of us can be nosy at times, some people take his to a whole new level. My biggest pet peeve is when people ask me questions of a personal nature but then fail to disclose anything personal about themselves. If you feel someone is being a bit too intrusive, tell him straight out that it's making you feel uncomfortable. If you'd rather not answer questions being thrown your way, feel free to dodge them and change the subject. People will get the point. I sometimes feel as though some people don't have anything exciting going on in their lives, and so they proceed to probe into other people's business. It's best you stand firm and put a stop to it early on -- or else they'll think you...

Whether it's a meddlesome neighbor, snoopy coworker, or intrusive relative, we all know someone who can't seem to mind his or her business. Nosy people are everywhere. The question is: Why are people this way? Many people find their lives are relatively uneventful, and so they like to pry into the affairs of others. Further, others do it as a way of assessing how fulfilling or exciting their own lives are by comparison. I've come across a host of people -- particularly coworkers -- who love asking about my life, but volunteer very little information on theirs. In such situations, you have two options: either change the subject as if to suggest that you'd rather not disclose those details, or ask the same questions of the other person in kind. I find it hypocritical for people to go fishing for information on others while staying mum about their personal lives. Those who do this ought to find better things to do with their time!