Many of my readers have maintained that a key reason they're afraid to jump into a new relationship is because of the disastrous, toxic one they've only just escaped. Fair enough. And you deserve time to grieve the end of the relationship, for even though your life is sure to improve for the better, getting used to not having him or her in your life (especially if you'd been with them for many years) is an adjustment that doesn't happen overnight.  However, I do take issue with people, once ready to get back in the relationship saddle, turning down great opportunities, because, well, their ex John or Beth was a nightmare and this new potential partner may be just the same. Only by giving people a chance do you give yourself the opportunity to move on.  I understand feeling vulnerable and wanting to erect something of an emotional wall at first to protect your feelings.  But you can't allow the ghost of your ex to haunt you forever.  For all you know, this person wil...