I often hear people grumble over not having a Valentine or person to spend the holidays with, even though they acknowledge that singlehood still has its perks.  The biggest dating mistake keeping folks single is choosing the wrong people based on instant chemistry instead of long-term compatibility . Many people rely too heavily on that initial spark—mistaking attraction or excitement for a genuine connection. The initial connection is so infectious that they reason it has to be something deep and meaningful.  But chemistry alone isn't enough to build an enduring relationship. In fact, once the honeymoon phase has passed, both people's flaws and problems come to the fore. It is then you really know whether the relationship is built to last.  The key to breaking this cycle is: - Focusing not just charm or physical attraction, but on shared values and emotional availability  - Paying close attention to consistency over time—does this person follow through on what they ...

You wouldn't stay on a sinking ship, would you? So why stay in a relationship you know is faltering? Whether your partner is abusive, lazy, or doesn't bother putting in the time and effort he used to, it's probably time to kiss the relationship goodbye. As I've noted in my prior posts, I encourage people to voice their concerns to their partner before taking this drastic step. A good heart-to-heart where both parties clear the air is essential to the health of the relationship. But if your partner refuses to change his ways, that's a clear-cut sign it's time to move on. Sometimes it isn't that your partner has done anything overtly wrong. Rather, you lack chemistry, or both of you have lost the spark that once drew you together. It isn't necessarily anyone's fault, but even in this case, it isn't advisable to remain in a relationship with the person. You'd be wasting time on each other when there are other people out there for both ...