It's a question asked of me quite often. In the rough-and-tumble that is the dating world, do you stand out if you actually care less? Well, that depends on the people we're dealing with. Take a blonde bombshell who gets asked out all the time, with guys buying her flowers and candy left and right. Then, out of nowhere comes an attractive guy who isn't swooning over her. Though friendly, he treats her as he would any other woman he meets. She doesn't know for sure whether he's interested in her -- something she, quite frankly, is unaccustomed to -- and that piques her interest. The guy is effectively posing a challenge, and she's compelled to unearth why he doesn't allow himself to be made putty in her hands like all the other chumps do. That being said, giving off a more non-chalant vibe might work when the target is very attractive and has no shortage of options to choose from. Some people perceive those who give them the cold shoulder to...

Whether it's a love interest who's made you their "plan B" in case it doesn't work out with their first choice, or a friend who only calls you when plans with other people fall through, never allow yourself to be someone's backup. What a lousy position to be in!  The other person is essentially saying that you're not good enough to be their top pick. Well, here's the good news: You will always be good enough for someone else out there. You will be someone's first choice. And that's why it's imperative that you not rest on your laurels when someone places you on the back burner. By doing so, you risk missing out on opportunities to meet or be with people who genuinely value your time and the ways you enhance their lives. Rather than pine for someone who doesn't want to give you the time of day, you should gravitate toward people who feel that investing time in you is well worth it. If people don't choose you, tough luck. ...

Is having too many choices good or bad? Some might say it's a good thing, as it allows you to pick what best suits your needs. Others contend it can be a bad thing in that it causes you to second guess your decisions, especially if the alternatives are fairly comparable. We face this type of conundrum on an almost-daily basis. Which job offer should I accept? Which computer should I buy? Which of these two guys should I become exclusive with? About a month or two before graduating from college, I was hitting the pavement hard in hopes of landing a full-time job. (Mind you, this wasn't long before the global recession began.) I went on a flurry of interviews and was offered nearly every position I applied for. I turned down the first two because I thought the salary being offered was a tad low. Besides, I didn't want to run after the first opportunity that came my way; I wished to take a little more time testing the job market waters. Unfortunately, the positio...

I made an appointment yesterday to get a haircut at my local barbershop. One of the reasons I switched from my old barbershop to this one was because I grew tired of having to wait 30 or more minutes for my turn despite my making an apppointment. Since making the switch about 8 months ago, I never had to wait more than 5 minutes to be attended. That all changed last night. Whether it was the fact that Valentine's Day is a couple of days away, or it just so happens that many people showed up at the same time on the same night, I had to wait close to an hour to be tended to. (Another woman made an appointment to get her hair dyed at 6:30, the same time I scheduled my appointment for.) I'm willing to look past this annoying incident given that, up until now, the place has never disappointed me. However, if this begins to happen more frequently, I won't be a happy camper. I spend so much time stuck in traffic each day (an hour to work and another hour going hom...

Teddy Roosevelt (1858-1919), who served as the 26th president of the United States, once said the following: "Complaining about a problem without proposing a solution is called whining." While I admire Roosevelt's larger-than-life personality and his wide-ranging accomplishments -- from leading the Rough Riders in the Spanish-American War to busting trusts to establishing a myriad of national parks -- I'd have to disagree with him on this one. I don't think complaining about a problem without proposing a solution necessarily means you're whining. Sometimes we're confronted with unexpected challenges that we may not know how to tackle immediately. We would then need some time to weigh our options, and if that bears no fruit, we'd likely seek support from friends, family, or a counselor. In general, we all have some sense of what we'd have to do to resolve a problem, but concrete solutions don't always come to us right away. It's ...