People need to stop comparing themselves to others, or happiness will always elude them. Someone will always be smarter. Someone will always be more attractive. Someone will always be younger. Someone will always be more popular. But they will never be you. Society makes being "the best" out to be the Holy Grail, but is uniqueness not more important? We bring a unique combination of qualities, skills, and quirks to the table -- ones that make us who we are. By comparing yourself to other people, you're essentially saying there is a standard against which you wish to compare yourself. This, for many people, leads to a sudden urge to want to be more like others, thereby relinquishing key facets of their individuality. Sure, you might admire smart, health-conscious, or stylish people and wish to surround yourself with those of that ilk so as to learn a few things from them. However, that should never translate into abandoning the very goals, principles, attit...

We all know at least one person in our lives who strives to keep up with the Joneses. They look to others for inspiration on how to dress, what car to buy, how many children to have, what career to go into, and even which hobbies to cultivate. And that person might very well be ourselves. While turning to others for ideas isn't a bad thing, shadowing everything they do because you crave validation and want to feel as though you're part of the in-group is taking it a step too far. Essentially, you're obliterating all that makes you stand out! Who cares if your neighbor drives a Bentley? If you're satisfied with your Nissan Maxima, that's what matters. Maybe you're the only person at work who doesn't have a dog. So what? There's nothing wrong with being a cat lover. Or perhaps you're the only one among your peer group who isn't in a high-powered career. As long as you're happy in your profession, why should you bother switching fiel...

Eleanor Roosevelt (1884-1962), the longest-serving First Lady in U.S. history, astutely advised people to do as follows: "Do what you feel in your heart to be right -- for you'll be criticized anyway." Essentially, she's saying that no matter what course of action you take, someone will take issue with it. So why not follow your heart and do what makes you happy? Roosevelt would be disheartened to learn that in 2018, over 5 decades after her death, people still get sucked into the "herd mentality" that drives them to seek others' validation. They believe and perpetuate the notion that true happiness lies with others rather than with and inside themselves. She'd quickly realize that social media has a lot to do with it, seeing as how people will post just about anything to amass as many likes and followers as they can. Whether you like football, abstain from drinking, are in a long-distance relationship, have only one child, enjoy travelin...

The strongest people do what John Adams (1735-1826), the second president of the United States, advised us to do over 200 years ago: "Always stand on principle...even if you stand alone."  Put another way, Adams suggested that we stand up for what we believe in without ever giving in to pressure to change. Doing so isn't always easy, and few knew this better than Adams himself. For example, he was roundly criticized by his own party for trying to avert rather than push for war with France, which carried out a series of attacks on U.S. shipping between 1798 and 1800. Had he pursued the latter course, his Federalist party might have come out victorious in the Election of 1800 against Thomas Jefferson and the Democratic-Republicans, who sided with France. But Adams refused to let politics get in the way of his bedrock principles. His are words that we should all live by. While none of us want to ruffle people's feathers by not doing what they want or not th...

Doesn't it annoy you when someone you hardly know -- a coworker, an acquaintance, or even someone you just started dating -- pretends to know you better than you know yourself? They proceed to give you unsolicited tips and advice based on their own personal experiences, expecting you to follow suit without hesitation. Ugh! Eventually, you'll have to break it to them plainly: No one knows you better than you know yourself. You really have to hand it to some people. They speak with such verve and self-confidence that it's hard not to buy into their every word and do exactly as they say. To be fair, I'm not saying that their advice should never be welcome. Sometimes people really do have valuable wisdom to impart, especially if talking to younger folks seeking some guidance. The problem is when they try to make decisions for us. They push us to leave our doctor for theirs, buy our next car at their preferred dealership, or even date someone whom they're sure ...

Maybe you're the quintessential book nerd like me. Or an avid painter. Or a fervent coin collector. Maybe you're a germophobe, teetotaler (i.e., you never drink alcohol), or obsessive Dodgers fan. There's something about you that likely sets you apart from everyone. That's a good thing, right? Well, not to all people. As I have emphasized on this blog before, when someone is a little different from everyone else in the pack, it tends to make certain people a little uncomfortable. So uncomfortable, in fact, that they might try to change you. For example, you might be a hardcore baseball fan, but the vast majority of people are into football. Your friends may try to dismiss baseball as boring and attempt to convert you into a fan of the pigskin. If you find yourself in a similar situation, do not -- I repeat, do not -- cave! People ought to mind their own business and respect the unique tastes and preferences of others. If you've given football a try and...

Today's quote comes from Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882), an American poet, essayist, and lecturer who led the Transcendentalist movement of the mid-19th century: "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson It's amazing how Emerson's words ring especially true in this digital era we live in. Whether it's on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, people are always trying to one-up each other in an effort to get as many "likes" and positive comments as they can get. They lose sight of their true selves and instead turn into the individuals society wants them to be. In essence, they sell out for social approval. Indeed, society says that we should do all the following: Look as skinny as possible Have as many kids as possible Get married as early as possible Work in the most prestigious high-paying jobs (vice president, etc.) Possess as much money and materi...