With the country -- check that, the world really -- on lockdown, many of us find ourselves with some extra time on our hands to contemplate life and weigh decisions that can have a huge impact on our future, whether personal or professional. Many people who lead busy lives welcome the change of pace, even though having to balance work and childcare at home can be awfully challenging for some. Life will go back to being what it used to be. It won't be long before we're once again stuck in traffic, jostling through lines of shoppers at the local Publix or Macy's, and exhorting unruly teenagers at the theater to quit making noise during the movie. That means it's going to take a conscious effort to hit "pause" and take a deep breath once in a while, as was the case pre-pandemic. Here's a suggestion for doing just that: Assuming you have one, just stop what you're doing and look at your pet or baby. Indeed, they teach us that we can be find h...

No one is "too busy" for you, at least not all the time. Those who say that are being dishonest. Sure, they may be too busy to call back or respond to your text today, tomorrow, or even this whole week. But to go several weeks -- if not months -- without getting back to you is just, well, too much for anyone to have to stomach. Even if someone is going through a rough patch in their life, a quick note to say as much -- and that they will touch base once the situation improves -- will more than suffice. Being left hanging isn't what someone who values you does. If anything, it demonstrates the exact opposite: indifference. People prioritize the things and people that matter to them. Such a situation is made all the more demoralizing when you recognize that you yourself make a conscious effort to respond to others even when you're down in the dumps. But as I've noted time and again, you can't expect people to behave exactly as you would or care a...

A telltale sign someone isn't satisfied in their relationship is when they muse whether there's someone better out there for them. Perhaps they've been with the same person for many years and have seriously questioned whether they've missed out. One thing people have to realize is that, as with everything else in life, decisions involve tradeoffs. The moment you decide to enter into a monogamous relationship with someone, you each forego sleeping with and dating other people. If someone isn't ready to make that serious of a commitment, they should clearly articulate to others that they're not interested in anything serious. However, in some cases, people are happy to be in a serious relationship and genuinely care about their partner. But the fact that things have fallen into something of a rut -- maybe they've become complacent, maybe the intimacy has ground to a halt -- has led them to wonder whether things could be more exciting with someone else. Unless ...

Don't just pay attention to people's words. Give greater importance to their actions , for they count far more. Think of words as being like the facade of a home, and actions being akin to the foundation. Sure, a house can look pretty and structurally sound on the outside, but if the foundation is compromised, it can have dire consequences. The same goes for a car whose impeccable exterior masks problems that lie under the hood. In the content of a relationship, people may say they would go to the ends of the Earth for you, but if their behaviors fail to back up their words, such individuals are full of hot air. It's people's actions that lend their words substance. Imagine how many relationships have gone down the drain because people's words didn't match up with their deeds (or misdeeds, I should say). Maybe you're in a relationship with someone who says he loves you, but he never seems to be around when you're most in need of his supp...

Studies show that our criteria for measuring success is markedly different now than it was several years ago. In the past, we typically perceived someone as successful if they boasted possessions that signaled wealth (e.g., car, big house, fancy watch) and appeared to have loads of free time on their hands. We assumed it meant that their net worth was such that they had no real need to work hard. In our minds, they likely spent more time sunbathing in the Caribbean than churning out reports in the office. However, the benchmarks we use to measure success have evolved over time -- not so much when it comes to material possessions, but in terms of overall lifestyle and work ethic. Studies suggest that we are now more likely to perceive someone as being successful if they have little to no time available for leisurely pursuits due to the many responsibilities they shoulder. For example, let's say Joe works 60 hours a week, has kids, and volunteers at a local non-profit. He h...

While we can say that our closest friends are usually reliable, we should refrain from depending on them all the time. Unfortunately, even they can let us down every once in a while. I'm sure you have at least one who comes to you in times of need, but seemingly vanishes when he or she no longer needs you. Then, when you try arranging outings with the person or need a favor, they're always busy. It really grates on me when friends act this way. Truthfully, those you call true friends should not be so flaky. A friendship is a two-way street. When only one person shows interest, it makes the other person feels as though they're being taken for granted. I don't care how busy you are. When you value someone else's company, you find a way to make time for them, even if it's a quick lunch or jog around a nearby park. Some people are all about give and take. Little do they realize that in order for a friendship to remain strong, there has to be reciprocat...

Do you know what the most valuable thing you can give someone is? It's not money. It's not knowledge. It isn't even love or affection. No, the most precious gift you can give someone is your time.  Why? Because it's the only thing you can give someone that you won't ever get back.  The time you spend calling someone on the phone, writing them a letter, or paying them a visit is time that will never be returned to you in this lifetime. That's why we should always appreciate the time people take out of their busy schedules for us, just as they should be grateful for the time we carve out for them. There are only so many hours in a day. We should all aim to make as much time for the people who matter most to us while reserving some time for ourselves as well. Between work, family, household chores, and hobbies, free time is very hard to come by for many of us. But the more effort we put into managing our time, the less likely we...

Whatever makes you happy, do more of it today. Whatever brings a smile to your face, do more of it today. Whatever you're passionate about, do more of it today. Whatever you enjoy fighting for, do more of it today. Whatever lifts your spirits, do more of it today. Whatever makes you grateful to live another day, do more of it today. Whatever makes you feel energized, do more of it today. Whatever enhances your well-being, do more of it today. Whatever bolsters your self-esteem, do more of it today. Whatever brings you closer to those you love the most, do it today. Whatever makes you laugh, do more of it today. Whatever enlivens your day, do more of it today. Life is short. Why put off until tomorrow doing the things that give your life meaning and purpose? Whether you love reading, writing, cooking, playing the guitar, volunteering at the local shelter, playing video games, or traveling to a new hotspot every so often, never cease doing the things you l...

Life is too short to waste our time chasing after friends, partners, or potential suitors who are too busy or indifferent to make time for us. I firmly believe that there's the right friend and partner for everyone out there -- the kind whom doesn't make you feel like you need to climb mountains and traverse rivers to see them. If you have one great friend who is always there for you when you need him or her, consider yourself fortunate. I know we all have an ever-increasing heap of responsibilities to worry about, and time just doesn't seem on our side. Still, a true friend will make the effort to squeeze you in. The same applies to someone you may be talking to on the love front. Whenever a girl failed to answer my calls and found every excuse in the book not to see me, I knew what the issue was: She just wasn't feeling me. As I've stressed several times in my posts, we can always count on the company of one specific person: ourselves. I'd rather enjoy b...

Today's quote comes from the Great Emancipator himself -- Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865). Ranked among the best U.S. presidents of all time, Lincoln is best known for guiding the country through the Civil War -- the bloodiest conflict in the nation's history -- and abolishing slavery. "The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time." - Abraham Lincoln What Lincoln is saying here is that the future comes only gradually, thus giving us ample time to plan for what lies ahead and realize our goals. I would argue, though, that this isn't always the case. How many times has the future caught up with us when we've least expected it? As I stated in my previous post, I proposed to my wife in 2012. We agreed to set the date for March 2014, which, at the time of the proposal, seemed a long way off. Well, those two years came around a lot quicker than I anticipated. The same goes for other life events that seemed to occur just the other day...

I have found that the trick to relaxing is redirecting your thoughts. After all, stress is, in large part, mental. I know, it's easier said than done -- especially in our busy, fast-paced lives. But all you need to do is take a few minutes each day to mentally disconnect from what you're doing and focus on those things that bring a smile to your face. Maybe it's your pet, your faith, your garden, a small business you're running on the side, or even a charity. In my case, I am an animal lover, so looking at pictures or videos of kittens does wonders on my mood. I don't have a pet as we speak, but glancing at those fur balls makes me look forward to the day I'll have one I can call my own. I also seem to feel better when or after listening to relaxing music, especially R&B. You'd be surprised at just how effective redirecting your thoughts can really be, even if you do it only once or twice a day.  Try it!