I feel many people have a misguided sense of what a partner's role should be.  They assume a partner is there to fix their every problem, to complete them.  But this is erroneous thinking and could very well lead the relationship down a dangerous path.  Relationships can promote personal growth and help individuals fulfill their own goals. For example, your partner can help you become a better person by teaching you how to play the guitar; taking you to the local museum to explore immersive exhibits; and opening your eyes to new perspectives, like benefits of eating more veggies and less red meat.  The idea that a relationship can help an individual become a better person is a phenomenon termed self-expansion. Indeed, relationships that provide more expansion are tend to be of higher quality. But this needn't be mistaken with relying on a partner to allay your every concern, resolve your every dilemma, and continually boost your self-esteem.  We need to take res...

What makes us powerful is not that we're better than anyone else, for everyone has flaws. It's that we're different from them. Sure, "different" can carry a negative connotation if it means the person is, say, a drug addict, woman beater, or compulsive gambler. In this context, however, different means unique. Maybe you know no one who can whip up a mean apple pie like you can. Perhaps people lean on you for all things spelling and grammar because they regard you as the ultimate wordsmith. Or, you're an expert a fixing cars, playing the violin, chess, or scubadiving. We all bring a different set of talents to the table -- ones we should not only embrace, but continually aim to strengthen. Having unique skills shouldn't be perceived as an excuse to show off or pretend one is above others. Instead, it affords us the opportunity to: 1. Demonstrate to others the kinds of things we love (which may not align with their interests, and that...

Never should we allow others to undervalue us -- nor should we let ourselves do it. At the end of the day, the only opinion about yourself that is completely accurate -- the sole assessment that really matters -- is your own. Self-worth, or self-esteem, results from our striving to treat ourselves with the love, care, compassion, and respect we deserve. Your self-worth can only be determined by you because it comes from within. The higher your self-esteem, the happier you are. And as I've stressed in my other posts, happiness emanates from inside of us. It's obvious that not everyone we come across in our lives -- from partners and friends to bosses -- will realize our worth. Still, that should never decrease our value in our own eyes. In relationships in which we don't feel valued, we have the option to address our feelings with the other person. If that doesn't bear fruit, we must decide whether the individual deserves a place in our lives. Now, this do...

"Have it your way" was Burger King's slogan for 40 years. The thrust was that consumers could customize their burger any way they wished -- without cheese, with extra pickles, and so forth. I always thought the slogan could be adapted to construct a very powerful inspirational quote -- by changing the first two words to "live life." Thus, "live life your way." That's the motto I feel we should all live by. Dress as you wish. Pursue a career in the field of your choice. Savor the hobbies that make you feel alive. Live your life by your own terms. As I've stressed in several posts, I am ardently opposed to following the herd. Life is too short to try to appease everybody. You'll always disappoint someone. You'll always fall short of someone's expectations.  What's really the point of trying to do things to others' liking? You never know if that relationship will end tomorrow.  We should all embrace our Go...