We all know how easily toxic people -- with their knack for negativity and gossip -- can throw a monkey wrench into our days.  But what if we leveraged that toxicity to our benefit? How, you ask? There's a myriad of ways to do this. Among them are these:  1. When they say you can't accomplish something, do you let their words derail your hopes and dreams? No, you use them to further  fuel your motivation to accomplish your goals. After all, who are they to judge? 2. When they criticize you for your style of dress, interests, or any other facet of your personality, do you scramble to change? No, you double down on preserving what makes you unique, which in turn will build self-confidence and boost your self-esteem. 2. When they disrespect you, whether by spewing outright lies or demeaning your character, do you turn around and do the same to them? No, you're better than that. You stand up for yourself, firmly if civilly, without hurling insults. This will equip you with th...

There are varied and various ways that toxic individuals may try their best to mentally and emotionally overpower you.  This doesn't mean they all employ every single one of these techniques. But it's important to know what kinds of tools these deceitful folks keep in their arsenal so that you're ready to fight back.   1. They try turning you into them.  Misery loves company, and because toxic folks aren't happy with their own lives, they want that misery to rub off on others. And there's no greater satisfaction for them than to hold a firm grip over your emotions. If they know they've gotten the best of you and ruined your day, they know their ploy worked. 2. They use the carrot-and-stick approach . Toxic people love to combine a promised reward with a threat to take something away from you. For example, your boss tells you that a raise hinges on your working Saturdays and Sundays, and that should you opt not to come in on those days, you'll lose your job. ...

It's safe to say that all of us lie here and there. Whoever says they never do it is, well, lying! From fibbing on our resume to sprinkling a few white lies on dates in order to make a good impression, there's no denying everyone stretches the truth at times. However, there's a certain group of people out there who lie compulsively and deliberately. They don't care what they have to say or do to get their way, and they're oblivious to others' feelings. For example, there are men who will say just about anything to get as many women in bed as possible -- whether it's showering the women with compliments that don't come from the heart, or lying about their net worth. On the flip side, there are women who deceive men into thinking they really care about them just so the men can buy them anything they wish. These people have mastered the art of lying -- so much so that it has become second nature to them. However, their deceit catches up with...

Don't just pay attention to people's words. Give greater importance to their actions , for they count far more. Think of words as being like the facade of a home, and actions being akin to the foundation. Sure, a house can look pretty and structurally sound on the outside, but if the foundation is compromised, it can have dire consequences. The same goes for a car whose impeccable exterior masks problems that lie under the hood. In the content of a relationship, people may say they would go to the ends of the Earth for you, but if their behaviors fail to back up their words, such individuals are full of hot air. It's people's actions that lend their words substance. Imagine how many relationships have gone down the drain because people's words didn't match up with their deeds (or misdeeds, I should say). Maybe you're in a relationship with someone who says he loves you, but he never seems to be around when you're most in need of his supp...

Has anyone -- whether it be your partner, friend, relative, neighbor, or boss -- done you wrong this year? If so, heed this important end-of-year tip: Let it go . Start 2019 with a clean slate. Don't carry other people's drama and negativity with you into the new year. Let your hopes and dreams crowd out your fears and worries. Sure, we can never rid ourselves of all our concerns, but why not start the new year on a high note? If you can't excise from your life the people bringing you grief, e.g., your toxic boss, make it a New Year's resolution not to get hung up on their every word or move. Refuse to allow these people to sour your mood, lower your self-esteem, and eat away at your mental well-being. If we're not careful, we can become trapped in a vicious circle of questioning people's motives, possibly blaming ourselves in the process: Why did they yell at me over the phone? Why haven't they answered my texts? Why did they seem to ...

How do you know if someone is on the rebound? A person might be considered on the rebound if he or she becomes involved in a serious relationship that shortly follows the ending of a previous one. And if the person was dumped -- especially if they never saw it coming -- it only amplifies feelings of wanting to get with someone new to get their mind off the whole ordeal. If you are dating someone who is rebounding, you may question if he or she is capable of emotional attachment or if you are, instead, simply a substitute for love that was lost. It can be especially hurtful when you sense that the person you're with isn't entirely over their ex. They might bring him or her up in conversations, whether they're mentioning how terrible the ex was or, even worse, comparing you both ("John was so much tidier than you are.") You may also take notice of the fact that they continue to hold on to and revisit photo albums, cards, and gifts that the ex gave them...

What do you think the three most precious things we can give someone are? If things like a whole lot of cash, a fancy car, or jewelry come to mind, you're not even close. The things I'm alluding to are intangible virtues that go far deeper. The three biggest gifts we can provide are our love , our trust , and our time . Love : This one is a no-brainer. Human beings seek others' love from the moment they're born. As adults, we turn to our partners, relatives, friends, and even our coworkers for love and support. If we can say that we truly love someone, it means they occupy a special place in our hearts, and we'd be willing to do virtually anything to make them happy. Trust: It can be difficult for us to trust people. After all, once someone breaks our trust, not only are we reluctant to trust that particular individual again, we make it harder for other people to earn it. To trust someone is to become vulnerable. Essentially, you're giving that person ...

The benefits good people provide in our lives are varied and obvious. They're kind, loving, and compassionate. They teach us to be grateful for the support and generosity we receive from loved ones, especially during difficult times. Now what about bad people -- the selfish, narcissistic, dishonest, insensitive, opportunistic individuals we come across every now and then? Do they benefit us in any way? Absolutely. Like the good people, they teach us a valuable lesson: Whom not to associate with. They demonstrate the opposite qualities we should strive to develop and nurture ourselves, seek in other people, and instill in our children. They embody precisely the kind of person we should aim to avoid because, rather than enhance our lives like the good people do, they diminish them with their pride, self-absorption, and callousness. Granted, nobody's perfect. We all exhibit shades of selfishness here and there. We all fib on occasion. But some people take it to a who...

Many people don't know how to tell the difference between love and infatuation. Here's the chief differentiator in a nutshell: When you're infatuated by someone, you perceive them to be perfect for you without even knowing them that well.  When you truly love or are in love with someone, they're perfect in your eyes despite their known imperfections. In other words, mere infatuation is conducive to an "ignorance is bliss" mindset. In the early stages of a relationship, when you're still unaware of a person's flaws, all you have to go on are their looks, words, and gestures, which together form your initial impression of them. You can't be certain everything they've told you about themselves is true, but you're so taken with the person -- especially after being showered with cutesy gifts and/or notes -- that you're willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. However, you can't really love someone until you know more ...

Today's quote comes from Winston Churchill (1874-1965), who served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom from 1940 to 1945 and again from 1951 to 1955. A prolific writer, artist, and historian, he won the Nobel Price in Literature and was made an honorary citizen of the United States. "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth  has a chance to put its pants on." - Winston Churchill What I feel Churchill was trying to say is that lies spread like wildfire, and even if the truth later surfaces, it isn't easy to undo the damage at that point. It reminds me of kids I went to school with who would spread rumors about their peers that were later discovered to be flat-out lies. Whether it was that one kid slept with another or that someone cheated on an exam, they had no basis in reality and often were started to undermine the target for a specific reason (they disliked or envied the person, etc.). We've also seen this play out in the media with poli...