If I asked what you thought to be an attractive attribute in a person -- one that doesn't get as much recognition as it merits -- what would you say? While everyone's taste varies, I'd say that intelligence -- a trait that, in my estimation, makes someone much more attractive and likeable -- tends to gets the shaft.  Check out online dating profiles and you'll see that people state they are looking for someone who embodies these characteristics: Sweet Fun Funny  Adventurous  Romantic  Kind Affectionate Faithful Honest Communicative While these are all great qualities to possess in their own right, why is intelligence not a more highly desired trait? The truth of the matter is that there are probably a lot more people who long for brains than they let on -- just as there are probably more chubby chasers in the world than we think. However, society has brainwashed many people into equating intelligence with nerdiness. And when they t...

Have you ever had a friend or partner who's made you feel replaceable? In other words, the other person may have a slew of friends or several people vying for their romantic affections, making you feel as though you're just a number on their list. This doesn't make us feel special or appreciated, no matter how many times -- and how emphatically -- they may claim to value us. We might crave more intimacy with this individual, but their tendency to hop from one person to another may create an emotional void. You might feel far more invested and committed because you have a smaller circle of people in your life. Perhaps you've done this deliberately in an effort to cut down on the drama and prioritize quality over quantity. It's saddening when people take us for granted because they know they have other options. Perhaps you've suggested a relaxing evening at home dining over a good movie, but someone else has suggested plans more to their liking. Ma...

If you had a choice between two deep, meaningful relationships and 15 superficial ones, which would you choose? (I hope you find this to be a no brainer.) We live in a time when amassing as many Facebook friends and Twitter followers as you can is celebrated, even if many of those people are friends of friends of friends whom you've never spoken to in your life. Our time and energy are not limitless. We ought to reserve them for the few people who enrich our lives -- not for those who couldn't remember our names or where they met us if their lives depended on it. I find that it's a good thing when your circle decreases in size, for it means that it's increasing in value because only the people who truly care remain. Can you imagine how many relationships have gone down the tubes because people stretched themselves thin trying to accommodate countless acquaintances whom, in the end, weren't worth it? When we stop and think about it, hardly any of those ...

Many people strive to amass as many friends as they possibly can. In my view, though, you only need two or three really good friends to feel fulfilled in life. There's a marked difference between having a deep friendship with someone you trust entirely, and having more of a superficial relationship, where you might converse with each other once in a blue moon on Facebook or at a special occasion. To me, building friendships isn't a numbers game. It's the quality, not the quantity, that truly counts. In fact, I only have three real friends, all of whom I made groomsmen at my wedding. I've known one of them since kindergarten, the other since high school, and the third guy since my first semester of college. While I may not be able to see or talk to them as often as I'd like, I know these guys are there for me when I need them -- just as I am for them. We have our occasional spats and differences of opinion, but the friendships are strong enough to survive a...

Going back to my youth, there's one thing about me that has never once wavered: my affinity for deep relationships.  Perhaps this explains why (1) I've kept a small circle of close friends my whole life, and (2) I've always sought serious commitments with girls, as opposed to men who sleep around for a few years before settling down. It goes to show you that for me, it's always been about quality, not quantity. I think having fewer people around minimizes the drama in one's life. The more people you know, the more social pressure you get to conform to others' views and agree with their opinions. I make no effort to maintain superficial relationships in my life. Those people won't be there when I need them, so why even have them as a "friend" on Facebook?  Life isn't a popularity contest. Our high school days are long gone. I have never had any patience for games. I know that makes me come across as a stiff, but I've alw...

There's a quote I saw somewhere a few years ago that has stayed firmly embedded in memory: "To the world you may just be one person, but to one person you may be the world." Think about it. There are roughly 7 to 7.5 billion people on earth. Unless you're Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Kim Kardashian, or some other famous politician or celebrity, you -- like me -- are merely a speck of matter on this vast, overpopulated planet. Luckily, each and every one of us has a special place in someone's heart. We're all the center of someone's universe, whether it's that of our kids, partner, friends, or all of the above. I don't know about you, but I'd much rather be loved by a few people and remain largely obscure to the general population than be in the shoes of celebrities and politicians, many of whom are reviled by people from all corners of the world. There's a reason why people go through an intense grieving process when they lose...

According to a study published this month in the Journal of Consumer Research , consumers shouldn't be so quick to let online user ratings guide their purchase decisions. Indeed, the study suggests that the belief that online user ratings, which virtually all retails provide on their websites, are good markers of product quality is largely an illusion. For the study, researchers investigated user ratings for over 1,200 products across 120 product categories, from blood pressure monitors and bike helmets to air filters. Their analyses reveal a very low correlation between average user ratings of items on Amazon.com and product ratings, based on objective tests, found in consumer reports. Further, the likelihood that an item with a higher user rating performs objectively better than an item with a lower user rating is only 57 percent, which casts some doubt on the validity of user ratings. The study also examined what information consumers rely on when judging the quality of ...

In recent weeks, I've written several posts encouraging readers to take pride in their true selves and not change their personality, quirks, values, or beliefs simply to appease others. And with that I segue into this important question: If you had to choose one quality you'd like to be known for, what would it be? Here are a few examples: Being kind Being sweet Being smart Being hard-working Being genuine Being humble Being sociable Being honest Being loyal While I wouldn't mind being recognized for my hard-working nature or humility, I think intelligence takes the cake. I am far from the most gregarious person at work -- I won't win any awards for my people skills anytime soon -- but people regard me as intelligent, and to me, it's the ultimate compliment. I was always a fantastic student -- getting everything from history trophies and reading certificates to writing medals. I graduated from college summa cum laude. Though I'm not i...

What would you do if someone gave you a cheap gift ?  With Christmas just a few weeks away, people are hitting the malls in full force, snagging everything from clothing to electronics. For some people, their holiday shopping list includes a few less expensive items they may plan to give to acquaintances or people they don't know all too well, like their kids' teachers, the cleaning lady at work, and so on. But sometimes we receive what we'd consider cheap gifts even from friends or relatives. This especially throws us for a loop when we've always given the other person higher-quality stuff. Would you feel the gift is a reflection of how much (or little) that individual values you? The first thing one has to determine is whether the person is strapped for cash. If he or she bought you something cheap because they really can't do any better at this time, then it's understandable. Most of us would probably do the same if we were in their shoes. The mere ...