Ever feel like people around you are watching you, but when you look straight at them, they have their attention fixed elsewhere? That may just be the spotlight effect at play -- a phenomenon in which people perceive that they are being noticed more than they really are. Human beings are the center of their own world, but they tend to forget they're not the center of everyone else's. We go to great lengths to look good for social functions and so forth, but unless we're planning to give, say, a speech or toast, there's no reason to assume all eyes will be on us all the time. Of course, things may happen that can cause the spotlight to be on you. For example, you may slip while walking across the room, or you may be wearing very eccentric clothing that may prompt people to direct their attention to you. The way I see it, the spotlight effect is akin to being in a heightened state of self-consciousness. One might assume that everyone will notice her torn shirt. Un...

Let's face it: Everyone loves to be checked out and complimented--as long as it isn't done in a creepy, stalker-ish way--especially by someone we find attractive. It boosts our self-confidence and self-esteem, no question. The problem I find, though, is that many people-- particularly men-- assume someone is checking them out only because they made eye contact with them. Just because I look a woman in the eyes doesn't mean I'm checking her out. I might see someone coming my way (via my peripherals) and may simply want to see who it is. Guys are notorious for seeing more than is really there, especially those who are (1) shy (2) timid (3) not accustomed to interacting much with women. Women are usually more adept at noticing someone who's sizing them up. They are also much more subtle when it comes to checking out men who catch their eye. Now, catching someone staring or looking at you multiple times are usually tell-tale signs that you are being checked ou...