In relationships, there’s one pivotal factor that often goes unnoticed until it's too late. It’s not about communication, trust, or even love. While these are not unimportant, there’s something more fundamental that shapes the way we connect with our partners. This overlooked element can either strengthen the ties between you or cause subtle fissures that may widen over time. So, what is this game-changing factor? It’s emotional availability . Emotional availability is the ability to be present, to listen and respond to your partner’s feelings, and to share your own emotions in a healthy, honest way.  When both partners are emotionally available, they create a safe space for each other to express worries, desires, and vulnerabilities without fear of judgment, reprisal, or rejection. This emotional connection is the foundation upon which intimacy, trust, and understanding can thrive. However, when one or both partners are emotionally unavailable, even the most loving relationships c...

Do people try to make you feel guilty or foolish for wanting to do something that you know will make you happy in the long run, but that they perceive as wrong because it isn't something they'd do themselves? At the end of the day, it's your life! Whether you decide to date someone your friends may not be particularly keen on, venture into a field that does not square with what your parents envisioned, or nurture a hobby your co-workers may deem utterly dull, nobody's opinion should take precedence over your own gut instincts. Yes, the people near and dear to us may make well-meaning suggestions. But if they really think they know us better -- our passions, desires, goals -- than we know ourselves, they're flat-out fooling themselves. Let's face it: Sometimes going down a different path than others brings out their insecurities. People want you to think and act in ways that validate their own decisions. So when you do something that strikes them as...

Self-awareness is critical to a happy, balanced life. The dictionary defines it as "conscious knowledge of one's own character, feelings, motives, and desires. Take a deep dive within yourself and explore that which makes you happy, sad, excited, nervous, peaceful. Analyze your words. Assess your motives. Delve into your deepest desires. Only by paying attention to your feelings can you truly get to know yourself -- the things that make you unique, the inherent qualities that set you apart. It's not about criticizing yourself, but rather being cognizant of your patterns of thought and behavior. Just because you acknowledge your faults doesn't mean you dwell on them. But recognizing them enables you to decide which ones you're willing to accept as well as the ones that call for change. Self-awareness doesn't necessarily stop you from making mistakes -- it allows you to learn from them so that you're less apt to repeat them in the future...

Whether we're at work or at the mall, people often judge us based on two criteria -- very superficial ones, I might add -- in our daily lives: (1) what we own and (2) what we've accomplished. Ever heard the expression, "You are what you eat?" A more accurate version would be, "You are what you wear, what you drive, what you have in your wallet, and what you do for a living." It's a testament to how shallow society has become. Granted, your job is important in that it's part of who you are. But I find it rather unsettling that people would measure others' worth based on what brands they sport and what their title is. For example, a friend of mine is incredulous at the fact that I have no aspirations to become a vice president or CEO. I've told him repeatedly that managing others and spending most of my time in meetings doesn't appeal to me. I'd much rather remain low enough in the food chain where I'm making a decent ...

The expression "settling for less" gets thrown around quite loosely, but what many people fail to realize is that it is entirely subjective. One's idea of settling less may not jibe with someone else's. While you may perfectly content with a GUESS purse, your gaudy friend may feel you're settling for less unless you opt for a more luxurious brand, like Coach or Louis Vuitton. Or, while you're happy to hook up with average-looking but highly intelligent guys, your sister may insist that you're settling for less unless you set your sights on guys who are a "9" or better in the appearance department. Furthermore, you may be told you can do better if you are not the CEO of your company, but what if you're happy having a less taxing, lower-paying job if it means spending more quality time with friends and family? This type of thinking is seriously misguided. The fact is that people have different tastes and disparate desires. Some of...

As much as we might say we love to help and be around others, we can't truly care for other people until we feel that way about ourselves. And even once we get to that point, we're the only ones we can always reply upon. Whenever you feel a little down and have the urge to reach out to someone to brighten your mood, don't bother. Stop for a second and think about great things you yourself have achieved or experienced, whether it was to rescue a litter of kittens, spend a week in China, earn a promotion, graduate with highest honors, or land a date with the most attractive girl in school. We are fully capable of cheering ourselves up by ruminating on our best qualities and talents, whatever those may be. In my case, I value that I am humble, non-judgmental, romantic, introspective, and fiercely passionate about learning new things. What's more, unlike those around me, I take great pleasure in reading and writing as much as humanly possible. Only you can determine a...