Do you find yourself in a troublesome relationship? Have you had just about enough of your partner's BS? No matter the circumstances, take heart from this: Many people out there are going through the exact same thing. Maybe you caught your boyfriend cheating and found it in your heart to give him a second chance, though you continually question the wisdom of your decision. Maybe your wife's reckless spending habits have put a major dent in your finances. Or, perhaps your husband doesn't invest nearly as much time or energy as you do, leaving you feeling as though you're carrying the relationship on your shoulders. A relationship is essentially a partnership that two people -- not one -- strive to keep strong and vibrant. One where both individuals' voices are heard and concerns are addressed. I'm a strong proponent of couples doing all they can to make it work, even if it entails enlisting the help of a counselor. If they're genuinely inter...

Have you ever stayed in a relationship a lot longer than you should have? While hindsight is always instructive, many people would admit that they began seeing the red flags early on, but decided to turn a blind eye. But why would people do this? As I've noted in prior entries, people could do it for a variety of reasons, including: The fear of being alone They have a long history with the person There are kids in the picture Financial dependency A low self-esteem Fear of change/a reluctance to start anew  Beyond that , they think their partner has the potential to be a better person. This brings me to two mistakes I've touched upon in earlier posts that people with their heart in the right place tend to make: 1. They set their expectations of the other person too high. 2. They set out to help "change" or "save" them. The higher you set your expectations of other people, the greater the chances of being disappointed.  As ...

We argue with our significant other. It's a fact of life.  However, we can only hope that our bond will emerge stronger following the tiff -- with both partners poised to take each other's concerns into account and work toward allaying them -- than before. Here's the issue: There's constructive fighting -- where both voice their grievances in a tactful, non-accusatory way, and then there's vicious fighting , an all-out brawl where both individuals stop at nothing to say the nastiest things to one another.  Needless to say, you definitely want to steer clear of the latter if you want to avoid derailing the relationship. It will only cause the fighting to escalate, widening the ever-yawning rift between you and your partner and making you resentful of one another.  One thing many of us do which is a big no-no is the following: Instead of beginning with, "I feel hurt" or "I think you're being unfair," we frame our arguments in ...