Those who try too hard to be liked by everyone demonstrate two things: (1) they're insecure (2) they need others' approval/validation to feel better about themselves . They're the ones who cunningly adapt their personality to get in the other person's good graces. Consequently, they come off as being less genuine, willing to do almost anything to bolster their appeal. For example, they might say they share your passion for baseball or gardening when, in reality, they wouldn't be caught dead watching a game or fiddling with soil. I like to call these people fakes, charlatans, posers. There's a fine line between being gregarious and trotting out a deceptive persona. I urge people to be true to themselves -- to let the real them shine through. No one says that everyone has to like you. No one says you need the approval of all those around you. The day you relinquish the need for others' validation is the day you'll feel much happier in and about ...

Have you ever met a person who possesses enough charm and wit to win someone over in a matter of seconds? It can be anyone from the affable car salesman at the local dealer to a gregarious classmate to the amicable hiring manager you meet with for a job interview. Many people with sharp people skills are quick to employ them in order to get something they want, whether it's a sale or date. In psychology, the mere exposure effect is a phenomenon whereby people tend to develop a preference for something merely because they are familiar with them. In other words, familiarity breeds likeability. That's why, contrary to popular belief, things like follow-up calls and thank you letters can have a powerful effect so long as the individual made a great first impression. What's more, they will do little things to further build rapport, from pretending to agree with you on a wide range of issues (when deep down they diverge with you on many of them) to making it seem they...

If you're quiet, you likely get plenty of flak from people around you. You're judged left and right just for keeping to yourself. Since people can't get you to open up as often as they'd like, they take the liberty of filling the gaps on their own. Some of them call you a snob, others say you're weird, and still others go so far as to label you antisocial. Saying you're introspective and that you think before you speak isn't good enough for them. Trying to explain that you're introverted -- that your energy is directed inward as opposed to an extrovert, whose energy is directed outward -- is a futile exercise. You tell them that too much social interaction leaves you drained, and that you can only recharge by spending time alone, but it falls on deaf ears. Sometimes it feels like no one understands you. But I'm here to tell you one thing: I get you. I know what you're going through because I've been there. As a quiet, studio...

If you were asked whether your personality was more like that of Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton, who would you pick? Chances are, if you're stubborn, assertive, unpredictable, love the spotlight, and have a tendency to say things without thinking them through first, you'll likely say Trump. If you're more reserved, predictable, averse to the spotlight, bookish, and given to researching things before making an argument, you'll probably select Hillary. I'm not saying one style is necessarily better than the other. We all have different temperaments, and if we're happy with them, why try to change? I find my personality most closely mirrors Hillary Clinton's. Some would say I have a very scholarly way of looking at the world. I tend to be very thorough, organized, and detail-oriented. I always do my research before a job interview or meeting, making sure to learn (and sometimes memorize) as much information as I can. I usually stick to the facts and ...

There are smart people, and then there are confident people. While some people possess both smarts and self-confidence, others may have or exhibit only one of these attributes.  There's no question that politicians like Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama are bright, self-assured people. Connections notwithstanding, they would otherwise not have made it to the big stage.  Of course, people are at their best when they embody both of these characteristics. You could be the smartest guy in the world, but if you don't make your points with some level of conviction, no one would ever know it. People won't believe what you're saying -- no matter how ground-breaking or erudite -- if you don't sound sure of yourself. At the same time, being gregarious won't get you far unless whatever you're discussing has substance. Spouting off nonsense undercuts any confidence you may bring to the table because, after a while, people will simply w...