Many of us become stressed by our inability to control the future. For example, you may be ruminating night and day about how different things at work will be once your boss retires. Or maybe you're on edge over the fact that you've only recently gotten into a relationship and you don't know if it's going to work out. Maybe your spirits are low because you've been looking to buy a house for some time now to no avail. If there's one certainty in life, it's that life is uncertain. The only constant in our lives is change. Rather than sulking about it, we have to roll with the punches. It doesn't benefit you to fear worst-case scenarios that may never come to pass. You can plan for the worst, yes. Just don't convince yourself that the worst is actually going to happen because that will only make you into a nervous wreck. If we do find ourselves in that situation, we deal with it at that point. But agonizing over it in advance will on...

Is anyone in your life, to put it mildly, a pain in the rear end? Maybe it's your stubborn boss, narrow-minded neighbor, or obstinate father-in-law. The reason many people tend to be difficult is because they have trouble seeing things from a point of view that diverges from their own. To them, the sky is blue and can never be gray. Open-mindedness is simply not in their vocabulary, let alone their repertoire. What's worse, these very individuals are often reluctant to concede they're wrong even after realizing it. Egocentricity often goes hand-in-hand with intransigence. So what is one to do about people who have such a hard time being flexible in their views and opinions? All we can really do is make an entreaty for them to consider our perspective. If, however, it goes in one ear and out the other, then nothing will change until they come to the realization that others have a right to differ in their outlook -- and that their take merits consideration a...

Sometimes we need to extricate ourselves -- even if temporarily -- from others' drama and negativity. We need to wriggle free of adversity we may be confronting at work, home, or elsewhere. Our well-being depends on it! So how exactly can we do this? It depends on whatever it is you like -- whatever it is that drives you. Perhaps nothing spells relaxation like losing yourself in a good book during your lunch break before heading back to your desk. Maybe you recharge by taking a leisurely stroll in the park after work. You may notice that you haven't taken a vacation in almost a year and yearn to get away from it all -- whether that means sunbathing in the Caribbean, skiing in the Alps, or exploring historic attractions in Washington, D.C. Or maybe a spa weekend that includes a rejuvenating massage or stress-melting sauna session is just what the doctor ordered. No one says that relaxing has to carry a big price tag. For some people, putting the phone down and ...

True strength comes not from what you do, but from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn't. Whether it's thinking that learning a new language is too difficult, that a better job is out of reach, or that leaving an abusive relationship is near impossible, we can overcome these mental roadblocks we set for ourselves by:  Believing in ourselves  Adopting a positive mindset  Working hard to reach our goal  Accepting that occasional setbacks are normal  Never giving up You can do anything you set your heart and mind to. It may not happen exactly when and how you want it to, but you must never lose hope if you wish to prevail.  And achieving success sometimes involves taking difficult steps, like reaching out to others for help, reworking our whole strategy if not starting all over from scratch, putting up with people who may try to get in our way, and sacrificing ample resources (whether mental, financial, or time-oriented).  ...

Steer clear of those who hurt you more than they love you. Avoid those who drain you more than they replenish you. Stay far away from people who bring you more stress than they do peace and joy. Distance yourself from those who try to stunt your growth rather than applaud it. I know what you're probably thinking: In principle, this sounds fine and dandy, but you couldn't possibly avoid every person who occasionally makes you feel like crap, from your toxic boss to your meddling in-laws. To a certain extent, that's true. But one of the most effective ways to navigate relationships with difficult people is to not take what they say or do to heart. If you take everything they say personally, you're essentially surrendering power over your emotions to them. You're enabling them to win. No one has permission to make you feel bad unless you grant it to them. Remember, many of these people are unhappy and disgruntled in their own lives, so they see to it ...

We give up our power when we become convinced we don't have any. What power, you ask? While we may not be able to control everything that happens to us, we have the power to shape what comes after that. In other words, we can control what we do with what happens to us. Though it may seem difficult at times, we should try to look at hardships and challenges in a positive light. Notice how we emerge stronger after overcoming obstacles life throws our way, and are better able to navigate future ones. We should never take a defeatist attitude in life. Getting down on yourself won't solve anything. Instead, believe in the power within you to shape your own destiny. If you want to effect change, let your voice be heard. It doesn't mean you'll get what you want every time, but you will at least have tried. Imagine if people who changed the course of history -- George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Harriet Tubman, Albert Einstein, and Martin Luther King Jr. among th...

Remember "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey? What an inspiring song. There's no question that we should never cease believing in ourselves. If you don't believe in yourself, you won't make it very far in a world that constantly throws obstacles our way. Life is difficult -- and it demands that we remain strong and persistent in the face of tough challenges. Beyond that, no one should stop dreaming, or reaching for new heights. What good is believing in yourself if you have no dreams to shoot for? Aspiring to bigger and better things -- whether it be parenthood, owning a business, or buying a home -- gives us another reason to wake up in the morning. It gives us something to look forward to. I frequently hear others say their lives are dull, prompting them to reminisce about "bygone days." I'm here to tell you that your best days are not behind you; they lie on the horizon. However, you have to do your part to make that come to ...

Little do some of us know how powerful positive affirmations can be when it comes to breaking out of our depression and/or getting in a better mood. A moment ago, I came across a quote from George Washington that perfectly illustrates this point: "Happiness depends more upon the internal frame of a person's mind than on the externals in the world." Indeed, the mind exerts a much more powerful influence on our happiness than external factors -- from material possessions to others in our circle -- can. Telling yourself things like "everything's going to be okay," "you'll get through this," and "stay positive" puts you in a positive frame of mind rather than a negative one. When I've found myself down in the dumps, resorting to such positive affirmations has garnered me the strength to get up the next morning. And if you feel embarrassed that other people might hear you "talking to yourself," no one says you c...

If there's one trait that blemishes a person's character like no other, it would arguably be selfishness . I come across people every day -- at work, in the gym, at the grocery store -- who exude a palpable air of selfishness. You can just tell they put themselves before everyone else; they're constantly looking out for their best interest, even if they have to step on others' toes or rip them apart in the process. I'm sure you've met many a person who falls under this category. Here are a few words that typically describe selfish people: Manipulative Scheming Opportunistic Calculating Insensitive Self-centered Self-absorbed Greedy Contemptuous  Difficult Egotistical Stubborn  Dishonest Selfish people can be quite unpleasant to be around, especially when they can't manipulate you to get their way. They also tend to be quite unreliable, expecting you to be at their beck and call but refusing to be there for you when you need them. ...

Happiness is a decision.  It's a choice. It's a state of mind. You are as happy as you choose to be. The happiness ball is in your court, always. Life isn't about what happens to you, but what you do in response to what happens to you . You can either choose to sulk and let negative thoughts and feelings get the best of you, or you can look on the bright side and say, "Hey, things could be worse. Compared to what others are going through, this isn't that big of a deal." That kind of mindset can go a long way toward improving your mood and helping you appreciate what you have. Many people feel most unhappy when they compare themselves to others. But why in the world would someone do this to themselves? Other people are not you . Chances are, they don't share the same upbringing, like all the same things, or aspire to the same career goals as you. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to be more like other people. To do things as they do th...

As of today, I'll be dedicating select blog posts to examining the meaning of words most people are unfamiliar with and tying them, of course, to the world of psychology and human behavior.  This week, let's explore the meaning of the word curmudgeon .  According to Dictionary.com, a curmudgeon is a bad-tempered, difficult, cantankerous person .  It brings to mind irritable characters like Grumpy from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Scrooge from Charles' Dickins' "A Christmas Carol," and maybe even Donald Trump. We've all had to contend with so-called curmudgeons at work; in most cases, it's our own boss. We can also point to at least one person in our family known for being a major crank, whether it's a meddling grandparent or nosy aunt. It's safe to say we all have days in which we become curmudgeons . A couple of months ago, on the way to work, I noticed I had a flat tire. Having to take the car to the shop in the pour...