How many people do you know who only appear when they're in some kind of a bind? Here are a few examples you can probably relate to: They broke up with their boyfriend, and now they're reaching out to you nearly every day. But while they were in their relationship, they acted as if you didn't matter. They had a falling out with a few friends, and now they've suddenly surfaced. However, when things were peachy with their buddies, you couldn't seem to get a hold of them. And how about those we only hear from when they need a favor? Whether it's that they need money or help moving, they seem to vanish off the face of the earth once they get what they need. What do the three scenarios above have in common? They describe users to a tee. If someone wants nothing to do with you when things are going well in their lives, that should make you question why they wish to maintain any kind of relationship. Perhaps they see you as convenient to have around bec...

Shallow individuals are those who place a great importance on things of a superficial nature rather than on meaningful ones that should carry the most weight. We all know at least one person (I know a few, as a matter of fact) who makes looks a top priority when assessing potential suitors. While looks certainly matter, a "face like Brad Pitt's" or a "body like Jennifer Lopez's" should not top anyone's list of must-haves. At the end of the day, physical chemistry may get the ball rolling, but it's the mental and emotional connection you establish with someone (and, hopefully, a spiritual one) that sustain a loving relationship. Sooner or later, we go gray, get old, and gain weight. We can't expect to look like we did in our 20s and 30s forever, nor expect as much of our partner. Beauty is only skin deep. Qualities like intelligence, kindness, loyalty, integrity, and a great sense of humor are reliable gauges of one's true characte...

Never depend on anyone or anything to feel fulfilled in life. That includes: Your partner Your kids Your friends Your job/employer Your hobbies The operative word here is "depend." We depend on food, water, and oxygen for survival.  When it comes the examples listed above, they can certainly enhance our lives, but life satisfaction shouldn't depend on any one of them.  As we all know, things and people can change at the drop of a hat: Your partner could cheat on or fall out of love with you Your kids may distance themselves from you (or even grow to dislike you) as they get older Shifting priorities may water down your relationships You can be laid off at any given moment, or you may come to hate your job over time You can throw your back, rendering you unable to play football or other games you may enjoy  The car, watch, or mug you love so much could break unexpectedly I'm not saying these things will most definitely happen, but t...

Want a happier life? Many people assume that material possessions are essential to securing happiness, but this couldn't be farther from the truth.  In fact, here are two rules of thumb for achieving a more fulfilling life: 1. Use things, not people. 2. Love people, not things. It goes without saying that using people -- especially by trifling with their feelings -- is unacceptable. Save for cheating, stealing, or inflicting physical harm, taking advantage of others is the surest way to run your relationship with them into the ground. Now, just because you use things doesn't mean you have to place your happiness in them.  Material stuff -- from fancy cars to high-end watches-- serve to make us look stylish and our lives easier in many ways.  But such things wear and tear. No sooner do you get excited about owning the object than you're already planning what you'll buy next. Indeed, the novelty of owing stuff is only ephemeral.  A n...

My last post centered on how the internet can keep some of us much more entertained than others. Those who are not big on "things" -- the internet, books, and so on -- turn to people to keep them engaged. Why is this? Well, it has to do with two key factors: 1. Our personality 2. Our interests As I have mentioned in prior posts, extroverts direct their energy outward and thrive on social interaction, while introverts direct their energy inward and feel at their best while engaging in solitary activities like reading and writing. What's more, we don't all share the same interests. Many people couldn't care less about blogs, message boards, books, or Facebook. While some have remained reluctant to embrace technology, others don't use the internet as frequently because, well, they'd rather be bantering about in person. The internet can keep me entertained for hours and hours on end, but I realize some people would get flat-out bored after a whi...