It's normal to put yourself first every now and then. After all, if we constantly bend over for everyone but ourselves -- the demanding boss, the friend who's always broke -- our well-being will eventually take a major nosedive.  The people we have to be especially wary of the ones who take, take, take -- but never give back. Relationships are about scratching each other's back. But this doesn't necessarily mean they always have to be 50/50.  There will be times where one person is more in need than the other, whether they're struck with an unexpected illness, they lose a loved one, or they get fired from work.  We all have to contend with adversity at different points in our lives, and we often turn to friends and family for support.  But what if they fail to accommodate you even after we've been there for them countless times? It should be an indication that they're in it for themselves. I can understand their not being able to lend you money each and ever...

"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." - Dolly Parton What Dolly is essentially saying is that nothing in life worth having comes easily.  You have to work for it, and that often includes having to put up with others' BS for a while. For example, you've had it up to here with your boss's toxic ways and have set a goal of bolting to another employer before year's end. However, to realize this plan, you'll have to continue enduring his nasty tantrums -- if you haven't already called him out on such behavior -- until you find a new job, as the food has to be put on the table and the rent isn't going to pay itself.  Or perhaps you're reeling from the fallout of a terrible breakup. Life may seem bleak today -- especially after having to pull the plug on a relationship you once envisioned lasting your whole life.  But rest assured that the day you find yourself with someone far better th...

Stop what you're doing for a moment. Take a deep breath. Put a smile on your face. Tell yourself these words: "It's going to be okay." You've come too far in your life to give up. Whether you're healing from wounds of your past or stressing over the question marks in your future, remind yourself that true happiness lies in making the most of the present. Things will get better over time. If you're mired in relationship, health, or money struggles, rest assured that the worst storms often give way to much sunnier days. Never feel afraid to reach out -- whether to friends, family, a professional (or even to me) for a helping hand. I know that sometimes being positive is easier said than done. Just when we think we've come out of a hole, life seems to put us into a deeper one. But resigning ourselves to the opposite state of mind -- negativity -- will only serve to exacerbate the depression or anxiety we're already feeling. As long a...

Bob Marley once said, "You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." Indeed, we don't know how strong-willed and determined we can be until our resolve is actually put to the test -- that is, until we face serious challenges that can cause us to doubt our ability to surmount them. Many of us are thrust -- in many cases, unexpectedly -- into very tough situations that force us to summon every bit of strength we can muster, like losing a loved one, getting laid off, or being cheated on. The fact that gradually we are able to get through these hard times and move on with our lives attests to the tenacity of the human spirit. Time really does heal. And just because you may not be as strong as your peers doesn't mean you're weak. Some of us have simply gone through more adversity in life, and those experiences have better prepared us for similar predicaments that may surface later on. What's more, some people are mor...

Going through a funk right now in your life? Don't fret -- we've all been there. The beauty of it all is that we can always start anew the next day. Each day is a clean slate -- it gives us the opportunity to cancel out whatever hardship we confronted the day before and work toward reversing our fortunes. With a positive mindset, it can happen. Tomorrow offers limitless possibilities. I remember sinking into a deep depression during the throes of the Great Recession in 2008. News of widespread layoffs dominated the headlines, and I found myself hard-pressed to even find good jobs to apply for.  But I never gave up. Rather, I constantly reminded myself that tomorrow could be better. The promise of a better tomorrow was my glimmer of hope -- my light at the end of a seemingly endless tunnel. And indeed, after much hard work and persistence, I wound up getting a job. Each day offers a fresh opportunity to rewrite your life's story. Just because things aren't...

Today's quote focuses on adversity, which Merriam-Webster defines as "a state or instance of serious or continued difficulty or misfortune." "Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful." - Zig Zaglar  Human beings have a natural inclination to avoid or minimize any kind of hardship in their lives. In reality, though, we all need a dash of adversity every now and then to propel us to achieve something. Here are some examples: Being driven to lose weight after being teased by fellow peers Starting one's own company after being laid off one or more times Getting an A+ on an exam after initially struggling in a course Supporting a child by oneself after his or her partner walks out Finding true love after striking out repeatedly on the dating front You can likely relate to at least one of the examples above. Sometimes we face challenges in life that seem almost insurmountable, thus resulting in depression, ...