Skip to main content

A red flag you're dealing with selfish people

Selfish people careful

It's normal to put yourself first every now and then. After all, if we constantly bend over for everyone but ourselves -- the demanding boss, the friend who's always broke -- our well-being will eventually take a major nosedive. 

The people we have to be especially wary of the ones who take, take, take -- but never give back.

Relationships are about scratching each other's back. But this doesn't necessarily mean they always have to be 50/50. 

There will be times where one person is more in need than the other, whether they're struck with an unexpected illness, they lose a loved one, or they get fired from work. 

We all have to contend with adversity at different points in our lives, and we often turn to friends and family for support. 

But what if they fail to accommodate you even after we've been there for them countless times?

It should be an indication that they're in it for themselves.

I can understand their not being able to lend you money each and every time you request it, or not being available to pick you up from the airport each time you land. 

But declining your every request -- let alone never answering your calls or texts when you've communicated that you're the one who needs a hand this time -- sends a clear message. And that message is, "I don't care."

When it becomes apparent your time and effort aren't being reciprocated -- and will never be -- it can be a huge let-down, especially if it's someone we've come to trust and respect. 

You really don't know who your true friends are until you're facing hard times. Those who stand behind you are keepers, while the ones who bolt show themselves to be selfish to the bone.

Do you really want the latter in your life? I certainly do not.

The good thing is that, at the end of the day, we don't need a wide circle of close friends and confidantes. Three to five special, reliable individuals is more than sufficient. 

Refuse to be used. If you're dealing with someone who doesn't agree that relationships are a two-way street, you may want to nix them from your life. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Women vs. Men: Who likes to backstab more?

Whether it's on TV or in the workplace, the general consensus seems to be that women gossip, backstab, and stir up more conflict than men do. But, as with every other topic, I thought it only fair to put this so-called stereotype under the microscope. If you watch reality shows like Celebrity Apprentice, you'll notice it's the women who spend far more time bickering. While the men do at times become embroiled in tit for tat, it's the women who are portrayed as meaner and more hostile. In the workplace, I have noticed that women seem to gossip far more than their male counterparts. I haven't really seen any cases where a person blatantly backstabs the other, but I have caught both men and women in little white lies. If it is true that women are generally more into backstabbing and gossiping than men, why is this the case? I believe that it isn't fair to make a blanket statement like "all women play these games while all men keep to themselves and pre...