At some point, all of us have had a brush with someone intent on making our lives miserable. Perhaps it was a toxic boss, a jaded ex, a shady friend, or even someone within your own family who proved untrustworthy. But guess what? You're still alive. You survived. You emerged with a keener awareness not only of others' motives, but of the immense strength that lies within you. In an ideal world, we would get along with anyone and everyone. People would appreciate us for who we are, whether we own a BMW or a Versa, a small loft or a capacious mansion. They would prize us just the same whether we are meek or outspoken, bookish or adventurous. Alas, behind some nook or cranny is some bitter soul who wishes for their misery to rub off on someone in his or her orbit. No matter how hard we may try to please everyone -- how nice and accommodating we are to others -- someone will always take issue with us. And oftentimes we haven't done a single thing wrong to a...

Steer clear of those who hurt you more than they love you. Avoid those who drain you more than they replenish you. Stay far away from people who bring you more stress than they do peace and joy. Distance yourself from those who try to stunt your growth rather than applaud it. I know what you're probably thinking: In principle, this sounds fine and dandy, but you couldn't possibly avoid every person who occasionally makes you feel like crap, from your toxic boss to your meddling in-laws. To a certain extent, that's true. But one of the most effective ways to navigate relationships with difficult people is to not take what they say or do to heart. If you take everything they say personally, you're essentially surrendering power over your emotions to them. You're enabling them to win. No one has permission to make you feel bad unless you grant it to them. Remember, many of these people are unhappy and disgruntled in their own lives, so they see to it ...

The great Albert Einstein once said, "Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu believed that "if you are depressed, you are living in the past; if you are anxious, you are living in the future; if you are at peace, you are living in the present." Both men echo Francis Bacon Sr., who said, "Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand -- and melting like a snowflake." The gist of these quotes is that we should live in the moment -- otherwise known as mindfulness.  The dictionary defines mindfulness as "a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations." In other words, it involves being cognizant of your physical and emotional state without being judgmental.  Most peopl...

Where do you go to escape the day-to-day? What do you consider your refuge? Is a quiet park near your house? A bustling neighborhood pub where you meet up with loads of people? One's answer will depend on a bevy of factors, including personality, financial resources, hobbies, and so forth. I'm getting ready to go to the library in a couple of minutes, which I consider my hideaway -- my home away from home, if you will. At the library, I become one with books. I love devouring, smelling, and taking notes on them. In this age of Kindles and other electronic devices, I remain firmly ensconced in the traditional book camp. I have an office at home that includes myriad books, magazines, my computer, filing cabinet, and all the other essentials. As much as I try to do a lot of reading at home, I never seem to get very far. There are simply too many distractions in the vicinity, from my wife watching TV to dogs barking to my comfy bed calling out my name. Beyond that, ...

Happiness -- that's what! And let's add love, health, peace, and a sense of accomplishment from meeting one or more goals! I don't know about you, but I get the feeling it's going to be a fantastic year for all of us. Having that materialize starts with keeping a positive mindset. The more you believe that great things are in store, the more likely that is to come to fruition. Whether you aim to lose weight, start a family, or get a new job, I wish you only the best in achieving your goals. If you ever need advice or encouragement, please feel free to reach out to me. Or, you can ask questions of other fellow readers. Without a doubt, every visitor to the blog is always willing to lend a helping hand. I want to thank each and every one of you who's read and/or commented on my posts for your valuable contributions to this blog. Thanks to your unending support, the site garnered a record number of views and comments this year. It's your insightful co...

How to Understand People would like to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas! May it be filled with ample love, peace, health, and joy. Is there anything in particular you asked Santa for this year? Where will you be spending the day, and doing what exactly? My wife and I plan to spend the day with our families before hitting up the movie theater tonight. Share your thoughts and please be sure to also share the blog with your friends and family. Again, from our family to yours, have a very Merry Christmas!

Many people use the words "alone" and "lonely" as if they mean the same thing, when in reality they don't. I wanted to address the key differences between both in what I hope will be a very illuminating post. The primary difference between these words is as follows: Being alone is done by choice, while loneliness is not sought by the individual. How many times have we said or heard someone say "I'd like to be alone." There are times when even the most extroverted among us seek solitude, whether it's to clear our heads, gather our thoughts following an unexpected breakup, or just relish some peace and quiet. On the other hand, feeling lonely is not something people typically aim for. Loneliness has a negative connotation to it because it reflects a yearning for someone else's company -- an unpleasant state we'd rather not be in. As I have mentioned in earlier entries, a person could actually feel lonelier in a group than by himse...

How do you know it's time to close the door on a friendship or relationship? It's simple: You know the time is now when you couldn't care less about the person. Not only do you become completely indifferent to the individual, but you reason that your life would be better without him or her. You feel there would be more peace and less hostility if that person were given the boot. Doing this isn't always the easy, especially when you've known the person for a long time. But let's face it -- legacy alone can't sustain a relationship through the passage of time. People and things change. A person you deemed your closest friend or soulmate 10 years ago could feel like a nuisance today. You know that's the case when you hear the person's voice or see they're calling you and you instantly roll your eyes. I'm actually going through this as we speak with a friend I have known since high school. Long story short, this once-humble guy got a good j...

Have you noticed that we spend most of our time in noisy, busy settings? Whether it's the ruckus of children at home or the ceaseless chatter of coworkers in the office, it is reasonable to expect ample commotion whereever several people are gathered. That's why, every once in a while, I retreat to quiet environments where I can almost hear myself think. These oases of calm allow me to feel more relaxed and rejuvenated: 1. Church (not during mass): I like stopping by my local church for a prayer when I know I'll be the only one in there. My faith is an important part of my life, and sometimes I want to feel like it's only me and the man upstairs. 2. Park: Though expecting for a park to be completely empty is too much to ask for, I still appreciate the opportunity it affords me to enjoy some quiet time and commune with nature. 3. Library: By now, it should be no secret that I love writing, reading, and learning. What better place to do this than the library? In...