Becoming overly preoccupied with what others are thinking -- especially about you -- and doing is not conducive to a happy life. In fact, it can bring on feelings of anxiety and even depression if one isn't careful. When I say "don't think too much about people," I don't mean blocking out thoughts of, say, your adorable daughter's first steps, or repressing thoughts of your sister's recent promotion.  There are obviously favorable events tied to those we love that in turn bring us joy because we care deeply for them.  No, I speak of negative thoughts that can send us down the rabbit hole of overthinking. Examples include: Your boss throws you under the bus in a meeting, and you find yourself unable to let it go the rest of the day -- even though she apologized profusely and chalked it up to things she's going through in her personal life. Your partner agrees to pick you up from work on her day off work since the two of you are curre...

Many people have a penchant for imposing their views and opinions on others. This may very well be prompted by (1) their own insecurities (2) sheer arrogance (3) their inability to accept that others may not share said views or opinions. There's nothing wrong with offering well-meaning advice. But when people prod you to enter a certain line of work, date particular people, or pursue certain passions even after you've expressed no interest in them, that's when they've crossed a line. It's at that very point that innocent suggestions seem more like incessant hounding, and you have every right to put a stop to it -- even if it may spell the end of the relationship. These folks need to realize that they, like you, have their own lives to live and should not butt into other people's business. Some individuals have a serious problem comprehending -- much less accepting -- that others may not think or act like them. Just because they acted a certain way in...

You know it is time to pull the plug on a relationship when you've done everything conceivable to make your partner happy, but they fail to recognize your efforts and refuse to do their fair share. You've done everything imaginable to make the relationship work, but he or she continues to cheat, be lazy, take you for granted, or give you the cold shoulder. It's at this point you no longer feel guilty about walking away. In fact, doing so makes you feel liberated because it means you can finally pursue a relationship with someone who will invest the time and energy you do. A relationship that weighs you down -- one that leaves you feeling more dead than alive at the end of the day -- is no relationship at all. Rather, it is more like an albatross over your head that is inhibiting your growth. A good partner enhances our lives with traits that we may lack or that complement our own -- whether it's a great sense of humor, a flair for adventure, or a love of the a...

If you can't change a person or situation, change how you feel about that person or situation . This notion brings to mind another of my favorite axioms: "Life isn't about what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you." Let's face it: People are hard to change. Trying to change someone's tendencies, beliefs, or attitudes is often an exercise in futility. People get stuck in routines, and old habits die hard. I wish my wife were more organized and into sports and exercising. As much as I may entreat her to do these things, she will never ever be a neat freak or fitness enthusiast. At times, she makes half-hearted attempts to put in a workout or watch a baseball game, but it's obvious -- from the bored look on her face and her clear lack of enthusiasm -- that she's only doing it to appease me.  It can be frustrating to have to almost beg someone to do something, So what's my only option? To change how I feel about the situat...

There's no question that planning is an integral part of lives. We schedule everything from meetings at work to haircuts and dentist appointments. But did you know that scheduling leisure activities like happy hour can actually make them less enjoyable? According to a series of 13 studies from the Olin Business School at Washington University in St. Louis, leisure, once scheduled, becomes more like work. That causes people to become less excited by and even resentful towards such scheduled leisure. In the end, people enjoy such activities as going to a movie and grabbing a bite to eat much more when they're unscheduled. It makes sense that we would derive less pleasure from activities we've jotted down in our planner or smartphone calendar. Think about it: We've all made plans ahead of time, only to blow them off because we weren't in the mood or just didn't feel like standing up and getting dressed. On the other hand, if a friend proposes that you g...

If there's one thing people don't like, it's to be bossed around -- much less by their partner. Relationships are all about compromise. Give and take. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. Bossing your partner around is the quickest way to leave someone feeling oppressed and resentful. People should be afforded the flexibility to make their own decisions. They have as much a right to give their two cents as the other person does. You are each other's mate; you're one another's companion. No one -- no matter their gender, race, job, economic background, or personality -- has dominion over anyone else. Talking over someone, choosing their meals for them at restaurants, exhorting them to do things against their wishes, grabbing and searching through their phone at will: this kind of behavior is wholly unacceptable. Now, there's nothing wrong with one person always taking the lead so long as his or her partner is okay with it. Some of us are too gun-...

I know most of us try to avoid fighting with our partners and friends like the plague. After all, no one wants to be left feeling hurt or resentful. While arguments have been the primary culprit for the demise of many friendships and relationships, they've also been cited as the reason many became stronger over time. I've experienced this firsthand. In fact, I have had pretty bad fights with my wife and closest friends over the years. Somehow, though, I grew closer to all of them following the squabbles. I think an argument can only work in both parties' favor if they each concede some wrongdoing. Both have to be humble enough to admit that while they don't deserve full blame, some of the finger pointing is probably justified. If, however, one person refuses to acknowledge fault, fighting will only help the relationship see a quicker demise. Both parties must also be open to taking conciliatory measures. Saying "I'm sorry" is a good start. Both i...