It goes without saying that toxic people can be corrosive to our mental and emotional satisfaction. The longer they remain in our lives and the more time we spend with them, the higher the risk it poses to our well-being.  Stop for a moment to consider who in your life you'd deem toxic: Is it a boss or co-worker who has a knack for humiliating you at work? Is it a friend who talks smack behind your back?  Or is it even your own partner, whose comments about your physical appearance border on the abusive? Perhaps you might have multiple toxic folks in your personal and professional life. Such relationships can be awfully difficult to navigate, but with the right tools, you can neutralize their power and walk away stronger and more resilient.  The damage toxic people can inflict  Toxic people can undercut our self-esteem and diminish our feelings of self-worth. The more they repeat things like "you're not worth it" to us, the more likely we are to come to believe them....

Never should you remain in a relationship with someone if you are confident you can do much better.  When I say "much better," I don't mean you ought to bolt for someone who's richer or more attractive. No, I speak of a partner who doesn't treat you right. A person who ignores, abuses, or undervalues you. I put up a post earlier today on my Facebook page that says, "One person's trash is another's treasure." I couldn't agree more. Surely, you or someone you know has been treated like garbage by a significant other, only to find someone ten times more loving and appreciative later on. Staying in a corrosive relationship is akin to remaining in a toxic, soul-sucking job: You're stagnant, not growing, and treated poorly. No one should subject themselves to such terrible conditions. Have some respect for yourself and pull the plug. You're deserving of another's love and warmth. You deserve to be told romantic things,...

Chances are you've already heard or read about the untimely passing of NBA icon Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gianna, and 7 other passengers in a horrific helicopter crash that took place Sunday. Kobe had it all: Money, fame, family, health. And, yet, his life was taken from him just like that. Perhaps someone special in your own life has died unexpectedly, leaving you heartbroken and questioning why such events befall us. It really puts things in perspective and demonstrates just how precious life really is. Rather than holding grudges and stressing over insignificant things, we should strive to make the most of the short time we're on this planet. And we can do that by: Counting our blessings and making the most of what we have instead of always perceiving something as missing. Cherishing time spent with friends and family.  Indulging hobbies that make us come alive, whether that be reading, sunbathing, or volunteering at the local shelter.  Aiming to ach...

A New Year means fresh possibilities -- the chance to press that reset button and start anew. An opportunity to leave all the grudges, drama, and negativity that beleaguered you in 2019 behind. The chance to look forward to pursuing goals (new or existing) with renewed vigor. It isn't just about losing weight, getting a better job, or finding true love. It's about becoming a better individual all-around. It's about leveraging what you've learned up until this point through your mistakes and experiences so you can continually become a better, smarter, wiser version of yourself. While we can set out to adopt this mindset any time of the year -- no one says it has to be January 1 -- most of us see that date as a convenient jumping off point for starting with a clean slate. Whatever your preference, one thing is for sure: It's never too late to effect change in your life that will put you closer to fulfilling your dreams. Life is what you make of it. If yo...

Many of us would say that we loathe uncertainty. If it were up to us, every day would play out like a familiar script. But there comes a time where we have no choice but to venture into unchartered waters -- whether it concerns landing a new job; grappling with a new health condition; or making a large purchase, such as a new home. Stress is inevitable. You're likely to second guess your decisions. And, worst of all, you're bound to start down the slippery slope of imagining the absolute worst. If these feelings aren't reined in, they can lead to adverse outcomes like anxiety and depression. While some might advise you to simply think positively, I think a far more effective approach is to hope for the best, but plan for the worst.  Think about it: What are the chances of the worst coming to pass? Very slim, of course. Usually we end up dreaming up scenarios in our head that come nowhere near reality. Still, there is always a slight possibility that the job ...

How many people have you come across in your life who have been envious of something you possess or have accomplished? Maybe it's the new car you bought or the Hamilton tickets you managed to snag. Perhps it's the promotion you landed as a result of your hard work. Or perhaps they envy your fairytale-like marriage. While I've emphasized that material possessions don't bring us lasting happiness, you have every right to acquire and enjoy whatever you please. As long as you're not spending recklessly and hurting yourself or others in the process, what you buy with your hard-earned money is no one else's business. People should focus on themselves and quit worrying about what others are buying, whether it be cheap or expensive.  The problem is that human beings have this seemingly unshakeable tendency to compare themselves to other people.  Certain individuals can't live with the fact that others may have a better house, a prettier spouse,...

Stop what you're doing for a moment. Take a deep breath. Put a smile on your face. Tell yourself these words: "It's going to be okay." You've come too far in your life to give up. Whether you're healing from wounds of your past or stressing over the question marks in your future, remind yourself that true happiness lies in making the most of the present. Things will get better over time. If you're mired in relationship, health, or money struggles, rest assured that the worst storms often give way to much sunnier days. Never feel afraid to reach out -- whether to friends, family, a professional (or even to me) for a helping hand. I know that sometimes being positive is easier said than done. Just when we think we've come out of a hole, life seems to put us into a deeper one. But resigning ourselves to the opposite state of mind -- negativity -- will only serve to exacerbate the depression or anxiety we're already feeling. As long a...

Sometimes we need to extricate ourselves -- even if temporarily -- from others' drama and negativity. We need to wriggle free of adversity we may be confronting at work, home, or elsewhere. Our well-being depends on it! So how exactly can we do this? It depends on whatever it is you like -- whatever it is that drives you. Perhaps nothing spells relaxation like losing yourself in a good book during your lunch break before heading back to your desk. Maybe you recharge by taking a leisurely stroll in the park after work. You may notice that you haven't taken a vacation in almost a year and yearn to get away from it all -- whether that means sunbathing in the Caribbean, skiing in the Alps, or exploring historic attractions in Washington, D.C. Or maybe a spa weekend that includes a rejuvenating massage or stress-melting sauna session is just what the doctor ordered. No one says that relaxing has to carry a big price tag. For some people, putting the phone down and ...

We all possess a pretty amazing power. No, it's not the power to fly, shoot fireballs, or become invisible, even though those would definitely come in handy at times! We're instead endowed with the power to let go -- of people and things which bring us harm or fail to enrich our lives in meaningful ways. Many of us assume that we need to hold on to/perpetuate toxic relationships because we've known the people for a long time or we fear that others will not accept us as they did. Once a person becomes a mental or emotional burden in your life, that's when you know you're better of letting go. And waiting around for them to change is usually an exercise in futility. People hardly ever do. Additionally, once a job starts to suck you dry -- adversely affecting your physical and mental health -- that's a clear sign it's time to start looking for something else. No job is worth sacrificing your well-being for. Few people realize how powerful the abili...

I want to wish everyone a very safe and Happy New Year filled with love, laughter, health, happiness, and everything else you could possibly want! 2017 was a milestone year for this blog. It garnered more views, comments, and likes than in any of the prior years since it was launched. And it's all thanks to loyal readers like you! Without you guys, this blog would have become obsolete long ago. All the time and hard work I put into it is well worth it because I have the most engaged, intelligent, and -- put simply -- amazing audience I could ever ask for. Whether you'll be awaiting the New Year at home with family, at a fancy restaurant with your significant other, or at a concert with friends, I hope you enjoy the final hours of 2017 to the max. I encourage you to reflect on the moments -- good and bad -- that defined the year for you, as they will help you chart a course for 2018. You'll not only want to replicate those good times in the new year, but build on...

As satisfying as the feeling of completing a project or getting a pat on the back from the boss may be, being overworked is never a good thing. It means you have less time for the things and people you value in your life. If you're under a great deal of stress, you may be suffering from sleep deprivation, anxiety, depression, and other health issues. That's why it's always best to work smarter rather than harder. Assess your work day and see if there's any way you can reshuffle your tasks/agenda so as to give you a little breathing room. Maybe you could use a temp or assistant, or perhaps you can ask your boss if he or she can cut back on the number of jobs being thrown your way. And if you feel that all the extra work merits a promotion or pay increase, let your supervisor know. You may very well be rewarded handsomely for the extra time you're putting it, but you won't know for sure until you broach the subject. At the end of the day, employers really ...

Happiness -- that's what! And let's add love, health, peace, and a sense of accomplishment from meeting one or more goals! I don't know about you, but I get the feeling it's going to be a fantastic year for all of us. Having that materialize starts with keeping a positive mindset. The more you believe that great things are in store, the more likely that is to come to fruition. Whether you aim to lose weight, start a family, or get a new job, I wish you only the best in achieving your goals. If you ever need advice or encouragement, please feel free to reach out to me. Or, you can ask questions of other fellow readers. Without a doubt, every visitor to the blog is always willing to lend a helping hand. I want to thank each and every one of you who's read and/or commented on my posts for your valuable contributions to this blog. Thanks to your unending support, the site garnered a record number of views and comments this year. It's your insightful co...

That is, if your goal is to become (1) rich in knowledge (2) rich in laughter (3) rich in health (4) rich in family (5) rich in love, and   (6) rich in experiences. Does money buy comfort? Yes. Does it buy security? Yes. Does it buy long-lasting happiness? It could, but that's not always a given. If it were, you wouldn't have wealthy celebrities battling drug and depression problems. Life is about more than money. Material possessions can only bring us so much happiness. Nine times out of ten, I get more enjoyment out of learning new things through a great book, compelling documentary, or visit to the museum than I do buying shirts, household appliances, and other stuff I might not even need. There are so many great things money can't buy. You can't put a price tag on the love shared between friends and family. You can't monetize laughter, especially not the kind that makes tears come out of your eyes. And you certainly can't appraise simple, every...

Being a workaholic often gets a bad rap, but I'm here to tell you that it isn't always a negative thing. Indeed, being a workaholic can actually be an asset in your life if three conditions are met: (1) you're passionate about what you're doing (2) it doesn't put a serious strain on your health, and (3) it doesn't adversely affect your relationships. As the saying goes, it shouldn't even feel like work if it's something you love to do. For example, as a writer, I'm happy to read until my eyes glaze over and write until my hand falls off. When I read about historic figures like Thomas Jefferson, who wrote close to twenty thousand letters in his lifetime, I'm left awestruck and, quite frankly, envious that I don't have the time to match his output! I am a rare breed in that my trade (writing) is also my hobby. But if being a workaholic is causing health-related issues or problems in your relationship, it's a telltale sign you're...

It isn't low pay or long hours, though they most definitely can be contributing factors in one's decision to bolt. At least those issues stand a chance of being resolved with some form of compromise, whether a raise or change of schedule. But being unable to get along with the boss -- no matter how hard we've tried -- is very difficult to stomach for 40 or more hours each week and the primary reason so many of us leave our jobs. In fact, many people admit that they leave specifically to get away from that individual; everything else about the job itself could be nearly perfect -- the salary, benefits, coworkers -- but they don't care. The boss has simply become too much to bear. What makes us reach that breaking point? It could be that the boss: Disrespects/belittles you Persistently takes you for granted Takes all the credit for your work Prevents you from growing within the department or company Shows favoritism toward others Is a slave driver Is a m...

I've observed that many people are too lazy to do two things that are greatly beneficial to our health: read and exercise . Their usual excuse tends to be that they're too tired to read or exercise when they get home from work. But the myriad benefits of these activities can't be overstated. Exercise helps you lose or maintain your weight, provided you also watch what you eat. It not only reduces the risk of heart disease, but it helps lower your cholesterol and blood pressure. Most people (including me) report feeling so much better when they exercise regularly. That's because exercise had been proven to reduce stress and anxiety and put people in a better mood. Then there's reading. It's obvious how beneficial reading can be for one's mental health. It keeps the mind busy. You learn new facts, new concepts, new vocabulary words. If you're reading non-fiction, the author's perspective can lead you to reassess your personal beliefs or opi...

How to Understand People would like to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas! May it be filled with ample love, peace, health, and joy. Is there anything in particular you asked Santa for this year? Where will you be spending the day, and doing what exactly? My wife and I plan to spend the day with our families before hitting up the movie theater tonight. Share your thoughts and please be sure to also share the blog with your friends and family. Again, from our family to yours, have a very Merry Christmas!

The Thanksgiving tradition stretches all the way back to the early days of the republic, when George Washington was at the helm of the fledgling nation. Following a resolution of Congress, President Washington proclaimed Thursday the 26th of November 1789 a day of “public thanksgiving and prayer” devoted to “the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be.” Reflecting American religious practice, Presidents and Congresses regularly designated days of fasting and thanksgiving through the the mid-1800s. But the Thanksgiving holiday we celebrate every November was formally established by Abraham Lincoln during the Civil War and made into law by Congress in 1941, when Franklin D. Roosevelt was in office. I think everyone should be thankful for their blessings each day of the year, not just on the fourth Thursday of November. We often get so caught up in work and other responsibilities that we neglect to focus ...

Life is hard. No one disputes that. Some of us go through moments in our lives that greatly test our patience, resolve, and even our faith. But for all the challenges we face, there are people in the world who have it a lot worse. I always try to keep this in mind whenever I feel the urge to issue a complaint. Below I've written a series of unfavorable scenarios we often find ourselves in and the kind of thoughts that should come to mind to help us appreciate our blessings. When you feel tempted to complain about horrible traffic (which I often have since moving, as my commute has grown considerably longer and more frustrating), consider this: There are people who don't have enough money to buy a car, so they have to brave the elements and do all their traveling by foot, via bus, or a combination thereof. Walking from place to place isn't always safe, especially if done at night, and buses can be full of shady characters.  When you feel tempted to complain about s...

When something bad happens -- you break up with your boyfriend, have an argument with your boss, realize your identity has been compromised -- it can be easy to become consumed with negative thoughts. But studies show that we're going the wrong way about it. Negativity leads to a bevy of unfavorable health outcomes, from high blood pressure and anxiety to loss of sleep and appetite. People underestimate the sheer power that our minds can have over us. As soon as we become fixed on an unpleasant thought, our day can quickly unravel. We become grumpy and irritable, taking out our bad mood on unsuspecting people around us. Getting upset is a natural human instinct, but it's when one allows that anger to fester for a prolonged period of time that feelings of depression and anxiety can set in. Being angry and negative won't make the situation get any better. Focus instead on those things that make you feel good -- whether it be your kids, pets, or stamp collection. Redir...