Have you ever wondered how narcissists manage to make good first impressions on us? Indeed, when we first meet people who later turn out to be narcissistic, they strike us as elegant, charming, and fun to be around. But over time, such positive impressions turn sour when we realize that these individuals are majorly self-absorbed and insensitive. Just how do narcissists manage to deceive us in this way? According to research, they're well-regarded at first because we mistake their arrogance for high self-esteem. As I've noted in earlier posts, there's a fine line between these characteristics. And when we're first getting to know someone, we want to give them the benefit of the doubt, so we perceive them as confident and high in self-worth. When sifting through photos of college students who'd completed narcissism and self-esteem scales, participants in four experiments rated those who scored highest on narcissism most likeable and highest in self-este...

When you always try to please others, some of them come to expect it and may develop a knack for taking you for granted. Before you know it, one favor becomes two, or three. You're lending people money even though it may cause you some financial distress. You're giving others rides even though you have your own errands to run. We all like helping others because not only does it feel good, but many of those people have been there to get us out of jams as well. But there comes a point where we simply have to learn to say "no." We can't always put others' needs and wants before our own. We have to remember that we're entitled to happiness just as much as our family, friends, and colleagues are. We have our own set of problems and priorities to deal with. It is, after all, our lives. Being a good person means being there for others when they really need you. It doesn't mean being at their beck and call, especially when it concerns trivial matte...

Thanks to your support, How to Understand People continues to garner views at meteoric levels! The blog launched in the summer of 2014 and continues to draw people from all corners of the internet -- from Facebook users to message board posters -- who are interested in reading about and discussing human behavior. My readers say they love delving into why people act and think in certain ways and exploring the wide array of topics I cover, from personality and relationships to consumer psychology. They also say they've found my advice and tips to be most helpful in their lives. In addition, many have also told me that they appreciate my intermittent posts on figures in history, as it allows them to learn about people and decisions that forever changed the world. If we don't learn from past mistakes -- whether committed by ourselves or other people -- we're doomed to repeat them. As always, I encourage you weigh in on every post that I submit. Share your thoughts and qu...