Why comparing ourselves to others is a bad idea

We all know at least one person in our lives who strives to keep up with the Joneses. They look to others for inspiration on how to dress, what car to buy, how many children to have, what career to go into, and even which hobbies to cultivate.

And that person might very well be ourselves.

While turning to others for ideas isn't a bad thing, shadowing everything they do because you crave validation and want to feel as though you're part of the in-group is taking it a step too far. Essentially, you're obliterating all that makes you stand out!

Who cares if your neighbor drives a Bentley? If you're satisfied with your Nissan Maxima, that's what matters.

Maybe you're the only person at work who doesn't have a dog. So what? There's nothing wrong with being a cat lover.

Or perhaps you're the only one among your peer group who isn't in a high-powered career. As long as you're happy in your profession, why should you bother switching fields?

If you're going to compare yourself to someone, it ought to be an earlier version of yourself, as that presents a far better gauge of progress than worrying over how you measure up against your peers.

We all have disparate likes, dislikes, hobbies, fears, dreams, and goals. Just because some people do not share your views or preferences doesn't mean yours are wrong. They may cast your choices or beliefs in a negative light, making you insecure enough to want to change yourself. Don't fall into this trap!

Set goals for yourself based on what you want rather than what people say, have, or do. Maybe you want to save up money over the next couple of years so you can own a bigger and nicer car in which to drive your family to places. The desire should be intrinsic, not one born out of a desire to emulate or impress people.

Do you ever look at old photos of yourself -- say, one from 6 months, a year, or 8 years ago -- and ask yourself whether the man or woman in that picture would be happy with the way things are presently in your life?

If you think that a younger version of you would not be content with the progress you've made in that span, it means you have your work cut out for you. (Granted, sometimes things crop up unexpectedly along the way -- from health issues to layoffs to relationship breakups -- that can veer us off course.)

It's never too late to work toward new goals and assess your progress down the road. At least you know it's something you're doing because you genuinely yearn for it.