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The #1 Dating Mistake That’s Keeping People Single (and How to Fix It)

How to Understand People

I often hear people grumble over not having a Valentine or person to spend the holidays with, even though they acknowledge that singlehood still has its perks. 

The biggest dating mistake keeping folks single is choosing the wrong people based on instant chemistry instead of long-term compatibility.

Many people rely too heavily on that initial spark—mistaking attraction or excitement for a genuine connection. The initial connection is so infectious that they reason it has to be something deep and meaningful. 

But chemistry alone isn't enough to build an enduring relationship. In fact, once the honeymoon phase has passed, both people's flaws and problems come to the fore. It is then you really know whether the relationship is built to last. 

The key to breaking this cycle is:

- Focusing not just charm or physical attraction, but on shared values and emotional availability 

- Paying close attention to consistency over time—does this person follow through on what they say? Or do their words seem to ring hollow?

- Avoiding patterns of chasing emotionally unavailable people and those whom you resolve to "fix." Instead, invest in individuals who reciprocate your energy and dedication.

By shifting your focus from instant gratification to long-term potential, you'll attract and develop relationships with people who are truly right for you. 

Mr. or Ms. Right may not catch your attention right out of the gate, but once you get to know them, their wonderful personality may enhance even their outward appearance in your eyes. 

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