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Why we don't "need" anyone to be happy

Many people are under the misapprehension that only by gaining the approval of others can we truly be happy.

But this couldn't be further from the truth.

While people can certainly enrich our lives, some individuals lock themselves into the mindset that without others' validation, they must be doing something wrong.

It compels them to plead with these people for answers. It pushes them to change in any way necessary to gain their acceptance.

Granted, if the person in question is living recklessly -- say, doing drugs, mistreating his wife, or gambling away his savings every weekend -- it is not surprising that others may not wish to associate themselves with the individual until he changes his ways.

But if he isn't harming himself or anyone else, there's no reason to deprive himself of experiencing happiness merely because certain people may not give their stamp of approval.

But here's the thing: Happiness comes from inside of you. Others' approval should have no bearing on our contentment. 

 And that's a good thing.

Because people -- much like jobs and money -- can be gone from one day to the next, sometimes with no warning.

People can stab us in the back, move away and forget about us, or pass away.

If we make happiness contingent on people, it may very well disappear along with them.

That's why it's so important to look deep within ourselves, for we are our source of happiness.

Maybe happiness can be as easy as enjoying a cup of coffee on a cold morning, taking a nap on the weekend after hitting the gym, or adding a stamp to the collection you've been maintaining for 20 years.

Even if you were to lose your job or partner, you could continue to enjoy these things.

Why should the fact that others may not like you stop you from doing the things you love?

It isn't healthy to make a human being or object responsible for your happiness.

One of the toughest challenges we face in life is dealing with loss and learning to navigate change.

If something falls through -- whether it's a relationship or business opportunity -- we have no choice but to reason that a better one awaits.

And if someone disapproves of how we choose to live our lives -- whether it be our career, car, style of dress, or choice of partner -- it's not our problem.

People are entitled to their own opinions, but not to their own facts.

We're social creatures who obviously desire healthy relationships with friends, family, and our significant other.

But even these people can't be there for us 24/7. And if we were to pass on, they'd move on with their lives -- as they should. We should adopt the same mindset, never relying on them to feel whole.
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