A HUGE mistake people make on the first date

We all have experience making a gaffe or two on a first date.

Maybe we've arrived late, accidentally tripped, hesitated when asked a personal question, or inadvertently burped.

While these are all unintentional slips, some people make a far more damaging mistake -- one that precludes the possibility of a second date.

If there's something that can send your date running for the hills in no time, it's moving too fast.

Here are just a few examples of ways that someone can overdo it on a first date:

Getting touchy
Trying to plant a kiss too quickly
Mentioning meeting each other's friends and parents
Discussing long-term plans, like becoming exclusive and getting married

People have to remember that this is a first date!

Take a deep breath, relax, and enjoy yourself without getting all wrapped up in the serious stuff so soon.

You will cross that bridge once you get there, provided that the two of you are compatible and wish to continue seeing each other.

On a first date, one should aim to be themselves.

By trying so hard to impress the other person and make all the right moves, you end up making the wrong ones. Indeed, you come off as bumbling, impatient, and insecure, if not desperate.

Sure, after a couple of dates together, the other person will likely have grown more comfortable with you and expect you to be more forward. But there's no need to rush. Things should unfold naturally.

First dates are about getting to know each other. Both people should be at their most authentic; otherwise, they're projecting a phony version of themselves that (1) the other person may find themselves receptive to, but later find out was a sham (2) dislike from the get-go when, sadly, they would have liked their genuine self.

Don't try to be overly confident, humorous, or sarcastic if that's not the real you.

Do you have a fear of heights? Say so.

Are you into gardening? Let him or her know.

Can't stand sushi even though the other person loves it? Be candid.

Above all, do not try to speed your way to third base, let alone the altar.

Comments

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

An important note to women about men and attraction

I was raised by my mom, grandma, and two older sisters. Growing up, never did I ever take any interest in the girls at school who tended toward exposing more skin. I always treated them as I would my female family members -- with the utmost courtesy and respect. And anytime I suspected that a male friend or acquaintance of mine adopted a hump-and-dump attitude toward women, I nixed them from my life. I held men who treated women as objects in very low regard, and still do to this day. If women feel empowered to show off their bodies because they love and work hard on their physique, more power to them. In other words, if they're doing it to please THEMSELVES and no one else, good for them. However, those who do it specifically to curry men's favor are making a big mistake. It sends the wrong signals and actually makes it less likely that a man will want to stick around for a committed relationship (if that's what you want as anyway). Granted, if you're not lookin...

How To Understand People

Search This Blog