Can being too nice make you less attractive?

It's a question that many men and women perceived as "nice" -- ones who have struck out repeatedly in the dating market -- have been scratching their heads over for what seems like, well, centuries.

Can being too nice make you less attractive to dating prospects?

As with anything else, there's no simple answer, and a bevy of factors have to be considered.

For starters, "too nice" for one person can mean something entirely different to someone else, just like we all have different opinions on what counts as too sweet or salty when eating different foods.

In general, though, a person may be regarded as too nice if they exhibit one or more of the following behaviors:

Being highly agreeable
Being a complete pushover by never standing up for oneself
Attempting to buy someone's affections by heaping them with gifts and compliments they probably don't deserve, at least not so early in the game
Trying to avoid disagreements at all costs
Lacking the confidence to make decisions without seeking someone else's input

When we first meet someone, it makes sense that we would try to be nice and accommodating given that we are trying to cast ourselves in the most appealing light possible.

But being obsequious -- never saying no, holding back any show of anger, constantly bending over backwards for the other person -- can be seen as a turn-off.

Most men and women would agree that they find it attractive when their partner displays confidence and backbone in that:

It demonstrates they won't allow anyone to step over them.
It shows that they're comfortable in their own skin.

A person can be nice, bold, passionate, confident, and driven -- all at the same time. You can be generous and polite without necessarily making someone the center of your universe.

You're likely to yield better results by showing the other person that your life is already fulfilling without a partner, but that you'd like to further enhance it by sharing it with a special someone.

Of course, if you get the sense that you have to deviate too much from your real self to make it work, that person is probably not for you.

But what people have to remember is that the other person is a flawed individual. They become nervous on dates just as you do. There's no reason to treat them as if they were perfect or better than you, because they're not.

Just take a deep breath, relax, and be yourself. If you disagree with them on something, say so -- albeit tactfully. It's a near certainty you will not see eye-to-eye on everything. If they're open-minded, they will appreciate your putting your ideas on the table without fear of judgment. If shows you're firm in your convictions and aren't seeking anyone's approval.

So, in closing, is it true that nice guys -- and girls -- finish last?

Not when they fuse those traits with other favorable qualities -- from ambition to confidence to a sense of humor -- that demonstrate they love who they are, enjoy their lives to the hilt, and would like a special person to come along for the ride.

Women vs. Men: Who likes to backstab more?

Whether it's on TV or in the workplace, the general consensus seems to be that women gossip, backstab, and stir up more conflict than men do. But, as with every other topic, I thought it only fair to put this so-called stereotype under the microscope. If you watch reality shows like Celebrity Apprentice, you'll notice it's the women who spend far more time bickering. While the men do at times become embroiled in tit for tat, it's the women who are portrayed as meaner and more hostile. In the workplace, I have noticed that women seem to gossip far more than their male counterparts. I haven't really seen any cases where a person blatantly backstabs the other, but I have caught both men and women in little white lies. If it is true that women are generally more into backstabbing and gossiping than men, why is this the case? I believe that it isn't fair to make a blanket statement like "all women play these games while all men keep to themselves and pre...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

Men prefer to marry brunettes

Study after study shows that men prefer blondes as girlfriends or mistresses and brunettes as wives . It seems many men see brunettes as more trustworthy and loyal. What's more, even though participants claimed that blondes are better in bed, they feel brunettes are better kissers and more affectionate than blondes. I find these results to be rather interesting. In my high school and early college days, I actually had a preference for blondes myself -- that is, until I hooked up with my now-wife. From that point on, I deemed brunettes as more attractive and marriage material, probably because they reminded me of and more closely resembled her. I think we can blame Hollywood, shows like Baywatch, and Playboy for painting blondes as wild, big chested, promiscuous and loose. (Yes, I know that there are brunettes in Playboy, but they seem to be in the minority.) When someone tells a man to think of an attractive blonde, who do you think likely crosses his mind? More likely than...

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