Partners, friends, relatives, coworkers, acquaintances -- they evolve, for better or worse.
Wishing things could revert to how they used to be in any given relationship sets one up for major disappointment.
The fact of the matter is that you may have a friend who's very different today from how she was in, say, 2012.
Shifting priorities, new experiences, and changing views each play a role in our evolution as people.
Unfortunately, such changes can be detrimental to a relationship. Your friend gets married or starts a family and forgets you exist. Your boyfriend has to relocate for his job and now you hardly hear from his anymore. Your closest cousin is hanging out with a different crowd and no longer seems like the person you grew up with.
It's understandable that such life events would make people less available. Gone are the days when you could arrange outings on a whim, let alone at the last minute. As life gets busier, social engagements need to be planned well in advance.
But if you find yourself in a one-sided relationship where only you put in the time and effort to reach out to the other and propose gatherings, you ought to ask yourself whether it's even worth it.
People find a way to make some time for what interests them, even if it's an occasional text or call. Sometimes all it takes to get things rolling again is a 10-minute conversation in which you let your feelings be known.
Perhaps the other person isn't even cognizant of the fact that they've put you on the back burner and, moving forward, will try a little harder to make time for you. If nothing changes thereafter, they may not care enough, and guess what? Neither should you.
If you can point to a long-term friendship or relationship in your life that you feel hasn't changed since the very beginning, consider yourself lucky! Cherish every minute of it, because those are few and far between.
People are not static creatures. As the years go by, we draw closer to some people and further away from others. Many people we once felt so close to become mere acquaintances, if that. And trying to salvage the relationship doesn't bear fruit if the other person remains non-chalant.
But as they say, life goes on.
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