Skip to main content

The 3 things we CAN control in life

While certain circumstances in life are beyond our control -- death and taxes among them -- there are three things over which we can maintain control:

(1) Attitude: We can see the glass as half empty or half full. Whether we view a situation negatively or positively is our choice.

(2) Our words: The words that come out of our mouths, as well as those we put down on paper, ought to be chosen carefully, as they're not always easily forgotten.

(3) Our actions: Life is less about what happens to us than what we do with what happens to us. Our lives are a direct reflection of the decisions we make.

However, this is easier said than done. Oftentimes, we're blindsided by unforeseen circumstances that cause our emotions to supersede rationality, resulting in our later regretting some of the things we say or do.

For example, you might be having an awful day after being passed for a promotion or getting fired. Upon getting home, you snap at your spouse when he complains for the millionth time that you haven't picked up the clothes you left lying in the living room.

We are, after all, human. We all make mistakes. When powerful feelings take over -- anger, jealousy, euphoria -- we're more apt to behave differently than we would with a clear head and our emotions in check.

That's why we should, to the best of our ability, temper those feelings with logic reasoning before we make decisions.

In other words, before hurling obscenities at your spouse in response to his complaint about your messiness, think about the repercussions of such an action.

We are in full control of our thoughts, which color our attitudes on everything from how favorably we view our lives to how we perceive those in our social circle.

And if our goal is to accomplish something -- lose weight, go on a few dates, get a better job -- we are in the driver's seat. Bo Bennett once said, "A dream becomes a goal when action is taken toward its achievement.

In sum, we can't control external forces in our lives, but we can control how we approach situations -- in terms of our thoughts, attitudes, words, and the actions taken in response.

It's up to us to control these in ways that are most advantageous to us.

Comments

Unknown said…
True and well said
Unknown said…
These are helpful comments that help us think instead of react. Thinking is a learned skill.
Unknown said…
I think I need help in taking action for a better life.

Popular posts from this blog

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

The 1 good thing cheaters do for us

Nothing good could come of a relationship marred by infidelity, right? The heartache, the shock, the feeling of one's trust being violated.  In the short-term, being cheated on can turn one's world upside down. But eventually, there may be a light awaiting the cheated at the end of the tunnel.  If you really think about it, cheaters end up doing us a huge favor.  In their selfishness and disloyalty, they end up showing us that we deserve better.  If you're so unfortunate as to be a victim of such acts of betrayal, you can only hope the cheater is considerate enough to own up to their missteps.  But we all know full well that, in many cases, the cheater is either caught in the act or leaves behind a trail of hints that ultimately culminates in their undoing. The more classy thing to do is to discuss their feelings openly with their partner before straying.  If all talks lead to an impasse or a further escalation of tensions, both parties should take it as a ...