Dare to be DIFFERENT

Take a moment to ask yourself these questions:

To what extent do you strive to live up to society's expectations of you?
How frequently do you try to do what everyone else does, only because that's the so-called "norm"?
How often do you do things to appease others just so that you're liked and accepted?

We live in a society that promotes a herd mentality rather than individuality. It's normal to be concerned about what others think of us, but some people follow the crowd to the exclusion of their feelings, likes, dislikes, and beliefs.

How did we become like this? Why do so many of us care so deeply about what people who don't pay our bills and who likely won't be at our side when we're dying say and think about us?

It all goes back to the days of early civilization, when cavemen roamed the earth. Back then, people had to band together in order to ensure their survival. The more people they could collaborate with, the better their chances of fending off dangerous animals, procuring food for themselves and their families, and so on.

While associating with many people in modern society can be advantageous in different ways -- say, for networking or babysitting -- that doesn't mean that we should go to such great lengths to be liked by everyone.

Yes, we can be similar to others in our thoughts and behavior, but we all bring unique perspectives and quirks to the table:

Some of us love to drink, while others wouldn't be caught dead with a beer in hand
Some of us love sex. Some of us don't.
Some of us are quiet and withdrawn, and there are those who are highly gregarious
Some of us are attracted to nerds, goths, skinny people, heavier people, etc.
There are believers and non-believers
There are liberals and conservatives
Some of us love and aim to have kids; a few of us have no parental itch
Some of us aim to be the CEO of a large corporation, while others would be just as happy mopping floors

It disturbs me when people try to impose their worldview on others around them. All of us are free to do and think as we wish, but that gives us no right to foist our beliefs and values on others -- nor they on us.

Never be afraid to be the real you. Let your genuine self shine no matter how much society tries to cajole you into thinking or acting a certain way.

Why give co-workers so much power over you when you know everyone is only there to make money? Why try to conform to your friends' or partner's ideals when you know your relationship can end at any point in time (we've all been there)?

Unless the individual in question pays your bills, has gotten you out of major jams on numerous occasions, or has done something that makes you indebted to him or her (e.g., saved your life), there's no reason to care so much about what that person thinks of you.

We come into this world alone, and we leave alone just the same. The only person you should aim to please is yourself. Remain in control of your thoughts and actions. Never let another human being hold sway over how you should live your life. Don't change unless you want to!

Women vs. Men: Who likes to backstab more?

Whether it's on TV or in the workplace, the general consensus seems to be that women gossip, backstab, and stir up more conflict than men do. But, as with every other topic, I thought it only fair to put this so-called stereotype under the microscope. If you watch reality shows like Celebrity Apprentice, you'll notice it's the women who spend far more time bickering. While the men do at times become embroiled in tit for tat, it's the women who are portrayed as meaner and more hostile. In the workplace, I have noticed that women seem to gossip far more than their male counterparts. I haven't really seen any cases where a person blatantly backstabs the other, but I have caught both men and women in little white lies. If it is true that women are generally more into backstabbing and gossiping than men, why is this the case? I believe that it isn't fair to make a blanket statement like "all women play these games while all men keep to themselves and pre...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

Men prefer to marry brunettes

Study after study shows that men prefer blondes as girlfriends or mistresses and brunettes as wives . It seems many men see brunettes as more trustworthy and loyal. What's more, even though participants claimed that blondes are better in bed, they feel brunettes are better kissers and more affectionate than blondes. I find these results to be rather interesting. In my high school and early college days, I actually had a preference for blondes myself -- that is, until I hooked up with my now-wife. From that point on, I deemed brunettes as more attractive and marriage material, probably because they reminded me of and more closely resembled her. I think we can blame Hollywood, shows like Baywatch, and Playboy for painting blondes as wild, big chested, promiscuous and loose. (Yes, I know that there are brunettes in Playboy, but they seem to be in the minority.) When someone tells a man to think of an attractive blonde, who do you think likely crosses his mind? More likely than...

How to Read People

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