Why we can end up with the wrong partner

With the divorce rate still between 40 and 50 percent in the United States, it's plain to see that many people end up in the wrong relationships with the wrong partners. Below is just a sampling of reasons why relationships may ultimately fail.

1. Both people hold different values, whether religious or otherwise
2. Both people come with disparate views on marriage and/or having children
3. They don't share the same hobbies/interests
4. Their personalities don't mesh well (one is a bookworm while the other loves to party)
5. One or both are irresponsible with money, chores, or other duties
6. One or both are unable to remain faithful
7. The romance dies out completely because one or both become complacent
8. Children strain the marriage irreparably

Some of these things aren't easy to predict early into the relationship. But once we've been with someone for anywhere from a few weeks to a few months, we can get a sense of views or habits that may not necessarily align with ours.

However, we may choose to ignore potential warning signs because:

1. We don't want to hurt anyone's feelings
2. We become comfortable with the person and are willing to overlook the bad on hopes that the person will eventually "change for the better"
3. We don't like giving up that which we've invested time and effort in

Some of these issues can certainly be worked through, but when it comes to others that can portend trouble to come -- like only one person desiring marriage -- both partners need to decide whether such differences make a relationship evem worth considering.

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