Throughout my entire life, I have always been a relatively quiet guy -- the type who lets work and writing do the "talking" for him. I tend to observe and gather my thoughts before stepping in. I don't usually open my mouth unless I have something meaningful to say. I avoid small talk like the plague.
These are the well-documented hallmarks of an introvert. Though I have always found comfort in my introspective ways, this certainly hasn't sat well with some people I've come across at school and in the workplace.
In middle and high school, I had several peers (and even some teachers) question why I was so quiet. My taciturn demeanor and reluctance to speak up, unfortunately, made me an easy target for bullies, some of whom I came very close to getting into fist fights with.
It isn't as though I didn't have friends or speak to classmates; I simply kept a low profile and minded my own business. I've encountered the same issue at work -- that is, people pressing me to speak or deriding my quiet nature.
What I've observed as I've gotten older is that some people take it personally when you don't talk to them. "Why doesn't that kid talk to me?" "Does he have a beef with me?" These are the kinds of questions I'm sure cross their mind.
People like to zero in on those who are a little different and try to get them to change. That's peer pressure for you, and there are countless examples we can dream up (goading people to take drugs, pushing them lose their virginity, etc.).
And when they fail to get anything out of the person, the quiet, self-contained individual is labeled a snob.
On the flip side, I have always had the urge to call overly talkative people out on their blather. However, I am wise enough to know that doing so wouldn't be constructive.
What would be more practical is understanding and respecting that people have different personalities. Just because I am quiet doesn't mean I need fixing, and just because you can chat till the sun goes down doesn't mean you should aim to change that. We need to be accepting of other people's dispositional traits. We should embrace that we're not only disparate in appearance but also in character. As is the case with nature as a whole, diversity makes life more beautiful.
To read earlier posts, click How to Understand People. Also, please follow me on Google + or share my blog on Facebook or Twitter. Thanks!
These are the well-documented hallmarks of an introvert. Though I have always found comfort in my introspective ways, this certainly hasn't sat well with some people I've come across at school and in the workplace.
In middle and high school, I had several peers (and even some teachers) question why I was so quiet. My taciturn demeanor and reluctance to speak up, unfortunately, made me an easy target for bullies, some of whom I came very close to getting into fist fights with.
It isn't as though I didn't have friends or speak to classmates; I simply kept a low profile and minded my own business. I've encountered the same issue at work -- that is, people pressing me to speak or deriding my quiet nature.
What I've observed as I've gotten older is that some people take it personally when you don't talk to them. "Why doesn't that kid talk to me?" "Does he have a beef with me?" These are the kinds of questions I'm sure cross their mind.
People like to zero in on those who are a little different and try to get them to change. That's peer pressure for you, and there are countless examples we can dream up (goading people to take drugs, pushing them lose their virginity, etc.).
And when they fail to get anything out of the person, the quiet, self-contained individual is labeled a snob.
On the flip side, I have always had the urge to call overly talkative people out on their blather. However, I am wise enough to know that doing so wouldn't be constructive.
What would be more practical is understanding and respecting that people have different personalities. Just because I am quiet doesn't mean I need fixing, and just because you can chat till the sun goes down doesn't mean you should aim to change that. We need to be accepting of other people's dispositional traits. We should embrace that we're not only disparate in appearance but also in character. As is the case with nature as a whole, diversity makes life more beautiful.
To read earlier posts, click How to Understand People. Also, please follow me on Google + or share my blog on Facebook or Twitter. Thanks!
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