You know you're with the wrong person if...

You know you're with the wrong person if you find yourself behaving in ways that don't come naturally to you just so you can appease your partner.

In other words, you fundamentally change aspects of your personality and character just to secure the person's approval, which you're sure will translate into relationship bliss.

As I've suggested in earlier posts, there's always room for some flexibility and compromise, but you should not feel like a radically different person when you're with your significant other.

Perhaps you're not into spicy food, football, or museum hopping like your partner is, but you make the effort to partake in such activities because he or she enjoys them. At the same time, you might expect them to participate when it comes to your leisurely pursuits, whether fishing, painting, or watching National Geographic.

But let's say you're a quiet, introverted person by nature, and gradually you come to the realization that your girlfriend is the exact opposite: loud and obnoxious, with no filter.

She then tries to wheedle you into accompanying her to nightclubs and road trips with large groups of people so you can slowly adopt her lifestyle and become more like her.

Do you really think you'll be happy knowing that you're turning your back on your own principles?

Needless to say, if you have to go to such lengths to make a relationship work, it just is not meant to be.

When you're with the right person, you shouldn't feel forced to adapt your personality to complement that of your partner.

As you get to know him or her, you should get a sense whether the two of you have enough in common -- from your temperaments and hobbies to political views and plans for the future -- to form a long-lasting relationship.

That isn't to say that the two of you can't seem like exact opposites in the beginning and gradually build strong chemistry, leading to a wonderful (if unlikely) pairing. But such cases are the exception rather than the rule.

If you have to overexert yourself to be someone you know you're not, you're better off waiting for someone who will appreciate the real you. (Imagine meeting someone new who you know you truly click with, but you're stuck in a relationship with a person who isn't right for you.)

Whether your partner is gorgeous, well-connected, or rich, nothing can justify being involved with a person who demands an overhaul of your personality.

If you're happy with who you are, wait for the person who will covet you at your most authentic.

Don't change just to placate another person -- let alone one who refuses to change anything about themselves for you. And if you realize later that you're just too different, end the relationship rather than carry on the illusion that you're going to change who you are for them.

Life's too short to surround ourselves with the wrong people.

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca...

How To Understand People

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