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Showing posts from March, 2016

TRUE OR FALSE: Women prefer these kinds of men...

Earlier today, a local radio station reported on its Facebook page that 75% of women prefer feminine men rather than masculine ones.  Since they didn't provide their source, I question the veracity of their claims. What's more, I've found the opposite to be true: Most women have told me they prefer masculine men. Not necessarily "muscle-bound" masculine, just a man who displays self-confidence and doesn't cry every two seconds. I'd like to think that not all women long for a Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Vin Diesel, or any of the guys portraying superheroes like Batman and Superman. Surely, there must be average Joes -- thin, chunky, brainy, and otherwise -- that ooze some sex appeal.  What's deemed sexy and attractive by one woman might be considered unappealing by another. Luckily, we all have different taste, and there's someone out there for everyone.  Still, most women would probably agree that the ideal man strikes a hea...

Dare to be DIFFERENT

Take a moment to ask yourself these questions: To what extent do you strive to live up to society's expectations of you?  How frequently do you try to do what everyone else does, only because that's the so-called "norm"? How often do you do things to appease others just so that you're liked and accepted? We live in a society that promotes a herd mentality rather than individuality . It's normal to be concerned about what others think of us, but some people follow the crowd to the exclusion of their feelings, likes, dislikes, and beliefs. How did we become like this? Why do so many of us care so deeply about what people who don't pay our bills and who likely won't be at our side when we're dying say and think about us? It all goes back to the days of early civilization, when cavemen roamed the earth. Back then, people had to band together in order to ensure their survival. The more people they could collaborate with, the better th...

Can perfume and cologne attract the opposite sex?

I don't think we need to consult a research study to conclude with certitude that the answer to this is clearly "yes." Of course, not all perfumes are created equal. Some are so strong as to seem intrusive, and it doesn't help when people are literally bathed in it. I receive nothing but high praise when I'm wearing what I deem to be the best of the best cologne, Armani Code. My wife, meanwhile, smells great when she puts on favorites like Light Blue by Dolce and Gabbana, Guilty by Gucci, and Heavenly by Victoria's Secret. It's not to say that by wearing cologne or perfume, you'll attract potential suitors like magnets. Emitting a pleasant smell is just a small part of the package you offer a potential love interest. Your hygiene, style of dress, intelligence, self-confidence, and value system and other physical and personal attributes figure prominently as well. If anything, wearing cologne shows that you care about the smell you're gi...

Here's why seeing into the future would be good -- and bad

How might your decisions be different? How might your life be different? Well, perhaps you would dump the guy you're dating after seeing he would eventually cheat on you. You might change jobs after noticing that your boss would gradually become abusive toward you, or change careers after seeing all the jobs in your current field would require upwards of 50 hours per week. Maybe you would not have kids upon discovering he or she would be born with an illness. Or perhaps you'd opt to move to a different neighborhood upon discovering your present one will see a rash of robberies in the coming years. Since we can't see into the future, it's impossible for us to always make optimal decisions. The best we can do is plan ahead and think carefully before making a big decision. Even then, what seems like a well-conceived decision today could turn out to be a disaster later on. The problem is that far too many people make decisions on impulse -- without at least consi...

This Day in History: 2 Key Events

Below are two key historic events that took place on March 29 -- 139 years apart: 1790 : Future President John Tyler is born in Charles City County, Virginia. He was the last president to hail from the colonial Virginia planter class that also gave us Presidents George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, and James Monroe. Family connections helped him secure a seat in the Virginia House of Delegates in 1811. He then went on to serve in the army during the War of 1812 and in the U.S. House of Representatives from 1816 to 1821. Tyler was elected as William Henry Harrison's vice president in 1841 and became acting president when Harrison died one month into his term. Because of this, Tyler was given the derisive moniker "His Accidency." No commander has had more children than Tyler, a whopping 15 in total. He had eight with his first wife, Letitia (who died early into his presidency) and seven with his second wife, Julia, who was 30 years his junior. He w...

Pick the RIGHT people to be in your life

No matter how hard you try to make people happy, some of them will simply take you for granted. Many of these individuals will be oblivious to or fail to appreciate all you do for them. It's these kinds of people you should not keep in your life.  You don't want to associate yourself with people who only care you exist when they need something -- when it's convenient for them. They may consider themselves your friends, but they're anything but. True friends are not users, nor are they opportunists. Real friends are there for you through the thick and thin. They understand that the cornerstone of a strong friendship is giving with one hand and taking with the other. There is absolutely no place for selfishness, envy, or jealousy in a friendship or relationship. These all serve to undermine the trust and goodwill cultivated between two people. More importantly, never seek the company of people who demand that you change something about yourself. Who are they to dict...

A new day to be thankful for

After being off from work three days last week -- including Thursday and Friday -- I felt the urge to complain about having to go back to the office today. I stopped myself just in time, though, and I'm glad I did. I reminded myself that there are many people out there -- whether sick, disabled, or unemployed -- who would do anything to be in my shoes. And how about all the people who've passed away and wish they could be working if it meant they could be alive and breathing? It's so easy to take life for granted and complain about the smallest things. I thank God for all my blessings, from my ability to see and hear to my family to having full use of both legs. I know many people out there are in worse shape, and I only pray that things get better for them sooner than later. I try to do whatever I can to help out, whether that's holding a door or donating money to charity. Life isn't perfect, but it could be a lot worse. The next time you feel the impul...

This Day in History: 1775

On March 27, 1775, Future President Thomas Jefferson was elected to the second Continental Congress. Jefferson, a Virginia delegate, quickly made a name for himself in the Continental Congress with the publication of his paper, A Summary View of the Rights of British America . Several more papers would follow in the coming year, including Drafts and Notes on the Virginia Constitution . In June 1776, Congress assembled a committee to draft the Declaration of Independence. Following a great deal of discussion, the committee selected Jefferson to compose the document. At just 33 years of age, it only took Jefferson a couple of days to complete a draft of what is regarded as the most important document in the history of democracy. After a few small changes, the committee submitted the draft, titled A Declaration by the Representatives in General Congress Assembled , to Congress on June 28, 1776. The document was formally adopted by Congress on July 4, 1776, under the new title The Dec...

The most precious thing in life is this...

I've mentioned this on the blog before, but it's so important that it bears repeating. It irks me when people stress making loads of money. Sure, money can make for a better life, but it isn't the most precious commodity. What is, you ask? The most precious thing we have is our time.  While you can lose and recoup money -- say, you get a good job after blowing your hard-earned savings at the casino -- you can never get time back. Those two hours you spent watching a horrible movie that never got better? You're not getting them back. That family trip to usually-sunny Florida during which the rain never stopped? Nope, you're not getting that time back either. All that time spent with a guy who wound up living a double life? It's gone for good. You know the saying, "Choose your words carefully"?  I think an even better one would be "Use your time wisely." We don't know how long we're going to be in this world, and the years...

CAUTION: These might make you overspend

Coupons. Discounts. Sales. We all love them. Anything that allows us to keep more money in our pocket can only be a good thing, right? Any signage at stores that says "buy one, get one free" or "50% off" can be so disarming. It's as if it gets our "spend money" sensors tingling. Ironically, coupons and deals compel us to spend money we would otherwise not shell out. Most consumers don't want to feel like they're missing out on a great bargain, so they're willing to purchase something they might not even need or be interested in. It's all psychological: we  care more about saving money than the actual product we're getting. "If I don't jump on this deal now, the price might go back up." Or so our thinking goes. Is it any wonder retailers have been so successful at driving shoppers to the checkout lines by imposing time windows? ("Hurry! This deal ends soon.") I work in and studied marketing and psy...

Smile -- great things are coming your way!

Don't let your or others' negativity get in the way of your happiness. If you're feeling down about anything -- no matter what it is -- tomorrow is a new day. While things might seem a little bleak now, your luck can change at a moment's notice. That's why we must never lose hope or faith. The more positive you are, the more likely you are to induce favorable events. You bump into the right person at the right time. Your resume gets into the hands of someone you know. Your hard work is finally noticed and you score that elusive promotion. But great things will only come your way if you believe deep down that they're possible. And, of course, it's incumbent on you to take the steps necessary so that those things can become a reality. You won't meet the right person by staying holed up in your apartment all the time. You won't get the promotion unless you promote your accomplishments. Never should we expect things to simply fall in our lap. Thu...

110,000 Views and Counting!

Thanks to your support, How to Understand People continues to garner views at meteoric levels! The blog launched in the summer of 2014 and continues to draw people from all corners of the internet -- from Facebook users to message board posters -- who are interested in reading about and discussing human behavior. My readers say they love delving into why people act and think in certain ways and exploring the wide array of topics I cover, from personality and relationships to consumer psychology. They also say they've found my advice and tips to be most helpful in their lives. In addition, many have also told me that they appreciate my intermittent posts on figures in history, as it allows them to learn about people and decisions that forever changed the world. If we don't learn from past mistakes -- whether committed by ourselves or other people -- we're doomed to repeat them. As always, I encourage you weigh in on every post that I submit. Share your thoughts and qu...

What would the older you tell the younger you?

If you were to write a note or letter to a much younger version of yourself -- say, your teenage self -- what would it say? Which life lessons or tips would you be sure to incorporate? Here are a couple that I would include: Enjoy your college years to the fullest. Once you graduate, you'll be entering the not-so-fun world of bills and responsibilities. Don't rush to find love. It's better to take it nice and slow. You don't want to feel like you trudged through a significant chunk of your life with someone who turned out a poor fit. As you get older, you'll encounter people at work and elsewhere who will try to get you to change. If you don't drink, you'll run into people who will pressure you to do so. They'll also question things like why you aren't married, why you don't have kids, why you're so reserved, why you didn't become a doctor or lawyer, and so on. What should you do? Never give in, of course. If people can'...

Don't change your personality -- for anyone

As much as I would love for Donald Trump to change his obstreperous demeanor, I'd never expect him to. He probably likes the way he is and wouldn't change his personality for anyone. For that, he should be commended, even though he'll have no choice but to bring it down a few notches if he wishes to appear even remotely presidential. Just a few moments ago, I heard my boss and co-worker conversing about the times they did drugs when they were younger and sharing videos of people making fools of themselves. I'd love to tell them to change, but who am I to do so? They must like being that way. But just as I'm respectful toward others, I expect the same treatment in return. I can't stand it when people question why I'm a certain way. "Why are you so quiet?" "Why are you so calm?" "Why are you so focused?" The implication is that something should be changed or fixed. They're making "loud and talkative" out to be ...

Why being an adult beats being a kid

Many people say they wish they could go back to being a kid again. After all, what is there to worry about during those years other than homework and video games, right? I much prefer being an adult to being a child, though. Here are a few reasons why: No more childhood teasing or peer pressure . Though it can be argued that some people still behave like kids in workplace, kids tend to be a lot meaner and more immature. At work, people know better than to make complete fools of themselves, as their jobs are on the line. And it's fair to say the chances of being bullied for your lunch money are pretty much nil. There's nothing like freedom . You are free to do as you wish -- drink, date whoever you want, watch whatever shows tickle your fancy, and so on. Having no one tell you what to do anymore (outside of work) is a fantastic feeling. I also like being able to learn for learning's sake -- and not because a teacher tells me to do it. Whether you're interested in ...

Here's another reason to love Starbucks

Although everyone knows Starbucks for its delicious coffee and expresso drinks, it's the company's charitable efforts that are getting more attention of late. Starbucks announced that it aims to contribute 100% of unsold food in the U.S. to Feeding America, a hunger relief organization. The idea didn't come from the top brass at the company, but from batistas behind the counter who felt the leftover food should go to the hungry. Companies like Cheesecake Factory, KFC, Taco Bell, and Chipotle already donate surplus food. Still, the U.S. Department of Agriculture estimates that 30% to 40% of America's food supply is wasted. Starbucks plans to have distributed 5 million meals -- including everything from paninis to salads -- by year's end. I applaud CEO Howard Schultz for this initiative and sincerely hope that many other restaurants including McDonald's and Burger King will soon follow suit. Poverty is a serious problem in America and around the world....

A city you've likely never heard of or visited

Most people have heard of or visited cities in the Commonwealth of Virginia like Alexandria, Richmond, Roanoke, and Williamsburg. But very few know much about Lynchburg, a city bursting with charm and history. Situated in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains along the banks of the James River, Lynchburg is known as the "City of Seven Hills" or the "Hill City." Lynchburg was established by charter in 1786 at the site of Lynch's Ferry on the James River. It became a major hub of commerce and manufacturing in the 19th century, and by the 1850s, Lynchburg was one of the richest towns per capita in the U.S., with tobacco, iron, and steel among its chief industries. From April 6-10, 1865, Lynchburg served as the Capital of Virginia. A Confederate supply base during the Civil War, it was the site of the Battle of Lynchburg, where the Confederates managed to repulse a Union attempt to capture the city. Moreover, Lynchburg holds the distinction of being the ...

Add this place to your bucket list!

Ever heard of Montpelier? Neither had I -- at least not until a couple of years ago. It happens to be the plantation house where James Madison (1751-1836), 4th President of the United States and father of the U.S. Constitution, and First Lady Dolley Madison (1768-1849) lived. They didn't live there full-time, of course, until Madison completed his second term in 1817. Located near Orange, Virginia, the estate is comprised of a mansion, historic buildings, exhibits, garden, forest trails and archaeological sites. The origins of the name Montpelier are dubious at best, but the first recorded use of the name is traced back to a letter written in 1781. Madison liked the French spelling of the word -- Montpellier -- which translates to "Mount of the Pilgrim." Madison had a staff of roughly 100 enslaved African Americans at Montpelier who served in a variety of roles, from cooks to carpenters. It was declared a National Historic Landmark and listed on the National Reg...

Important tip: How to prevent being a victim of theft

Every car I've had has been vandalized. It wasn't until recently that the reason for the break-ins -- and the same one applies on all three occasions -- hit me. I parked the cars in isolated spots. Up until this last incident, I honestly thought parking away from people made it less likely that my car would become a target for thieves. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way that the opposite is true. When fewer people are around, it makes it even harder for robbers to be noticed and thus caught. The opportunistic thieves capitalized on my lapse in judgment and stole valuables ranging from tires and rims to CDs and a radio. In the most recent case, I parked in an isolate area of a parking garage because only recently had I purchased my car and I wished to do whatever possible to prevent it from being hit or scratched. I realize now that I was being awfully anal, and it came back to bite me. The fact of the matter is that your car can be hit anytime, anywhere -- whether it...

This Day in History: 1854

Even if you aren't into politics, you're probably aware of the turmoil in the Republican Party right now, which finds itself mired in a civil war as we draw ever closer to the general election. Still, you might not know how the Republican Party started in the first place, which is the subject of this timely post. On March 20, 1854, former members of the Whig Party met in Ripon, Wisconsin, to establish a new party to oppose the spread of slavery into the western territories. Created in 1834 to oppose the “tyranny” of President Andrew Jackson, the Whig Party had been unable to cope with the national crisis over slavery. The party derailed as a result of the successful introduction of the Kansas-Nebraska Bill of 1854, an act that dissolved the terms of the Missouri Compromise and allowed slave or free status to be decided in the territories by popular sovereignty.  By February 1854, anti-slavery Whigs had begun convening in the upper midwestern states to consider the format...

Don't let your past mistakes paralyze you

Never let your past mistakes and experiences prevent you from taking on new challenges or opportunities. Most of us have had jobs that wound up being a bad fit, not to mention been in at least one relationship that ended badly. But you should never let the fear of going through another bad experience keep you from taking on a promising job or starting a new relationship that has the makings of a fruitful union. After all, it's experience that teaches us what we did wrong so that it won't happen again in the future. Next time a seemingly great job opportunity or dating prospect comes into the picture, we should be better equipped to determine whether either is right for us, given the lesson we learned the first time. Thus, experience should serve to facilitate growth and progress in our lives, not inhibit it.  I realize it can feel like a big gamble to take the plunge once more after being left hurt or disillusioned the last time. But integral to the human experience i...

MUST-READ: Never stay in a destructive relationship

You wouldn't stay on a sinking ship, would you? So why stay in a relationship you know is faltering? Whether your partner is abusive, lazy, or doesn't bother putting in the time and effort he used to, it's probably time to kiss the relationship goodbye. As I've noted in my prior posts, I encourage people to voice their concerns to their partner before taking this drastic step. A good heart-to-heart where both parties clear the air is essential to the health of the relationship. But if your partner refuses to change his ways, that's a clear-cut sign it's time to move on. Sometimes it isn't that your partner has done anything overtly wrong. Rather, you lack chemistry, or both of you have lost the spark that once drew you together. It isn't necessarily anyone's fault, but even in this case, it isn't advisable to remain in a relationship with the person. You'd be wasting time on each other when there are other people out there for both ...

Never walk in someone else's shadow

Never walk in someone else's shadow -- whether it's that of your parents, partner, or friend -- for each of us are destined to go down a different path. Ours are unique successes and experiences. Our interests, our innermost feelings, our convictions -- they're all far different from those of people around us. Don't fight what makes you different. Embrace it, for you are magnificent just as you are. Depressing would be a world in which all of us think and act in lockstep. One of the most rewarding aspects of the human experience is being able to share what makes us unique with everyone else. Never envy what other have, nor try to emulate how they act or think. You are your own person -- a wonderful one at that. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Believe you can make a wonderful life for yourself and you shall. No one can do that for you. Take pride in your personality, your thoughts, your values. Take pride in all you have to offer the world. A...

Go in the direction of your dreams

So said author Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862), whom I've quoted here in the past. Here's the quote in its entirety: "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined." Maybe your dream is to be an astronaut, salesperson, or environmental researcher. Perhaps you want to be the next Denzel Washington or Michael Jackson. No matter what your goals are, never let someone dissuade you from pursuing them. Never let them convince you that they're unrealistic or unattainable. We only have one life to live, folks. Even if we don't succeed at achieving exactly what we want -- or all we want -- we can at least say we gave it our best. Notice Thoreau says to go "in the direction of your dreams." Never does he explicitly say that those dreams have to be fulfilled. Let me give you an example. My dream would be to make big coin as a renowned historian -- I'm fiercely passionate about the subject. While it's c...

This Day in History: 1820

As part of the Missouri Compromise between the North and the South, Maine was admitted into the Union on March 15, 2016. Administered as a province of Massachusetts since 1647, the entrance of Maine as a free state was agreed to by Southern senators in exchange for the entrance of Missouri as a slave state. In 1604, French explorer Samuel de Champlain visited the coast of Maine and claimed it as part of the French province of Acadia. However, French attempts to settle Maine were foiled when British forces under Sir Samuel Argall wiped out a colony on Mount Desert Island in 1613. Sir Ferdinando Gorges, a prominent figure in the Plymouth Company, got the ball rolling on British settlement in Maine after procuring a grant and royal charter, and upon Gorges’ death in 1647 the Massachusetts Bay Colony claimed jurisdiction. Gorges’ heirs disputed this claim until 1677, when Massachusetts agreed to buy Gorges’ original proprietary rights. As part of Massachusetts, Maine developed early ...

Do you agree with this quote?

George Washington. (1732-1799), the father of the United States and its first commander in chief, once said: "Be courteous with all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence." I agree wholeheartedly with Washington, particularly when it comes to the workplace. Yes, we should be polite to and respectful toward all those with whom we cross paths. What we should not do, however, is give away our trust too easily. Never confide in someone until he or she has earned your trust. Many of us have trusted people we thought we could rely upon, only to get severely burned. It has made us think twice about doing everything from giving a potential partner our heart to discussing personal details about our lives with coworkers. Everyone we meet should be vetted. Unfortunately, many of us let our emotions guide us in our daily interactions with people. We form positive impressions of people without really knowing them that well....

Here's how to stop time from flying by

One question people often ask me is why time seems to go faster with age. They see themselves in their 40s and 50s and cannot believe how quickly the years have gone by. Perhaps you find yourself asking the same thing. Studies show that routine is to blame. The more repetitive things become, the less likely you are to stop and smell the roses, so to speak. You just take each day for granted in rinse and repeat fashion. That's precisely why we should aim to fill our lives with novel experiences. Whether it's exploring new destinations or trying out new foods, experiences that are unique and uncommon extricate us from the monotony of daily life and give us a fresh perspective. They make us think. They make us pause. When something is new and exciting, we engross ourselves in it, and we look forward to the next time we can partake in such an experience. Think about all the times we waited with bated breath for Christmas to roll around as children. Having to wait 12 months fo...

Start on your goals today, NOT tomorrow

If you're dead set on achieving something -- whether it's to lose weight, get a promotion, or find a partner -- putting it off until tomorrow won't get you any closer to your goal. Start today! Waiting until tomorrow -- or next week, or next month -- only increases the likelihood that you won't get around to achieving that goal. Either that, or your heart and mind truly aren't as invested in it as you may think. Procrastination is anathema to progress and results. Why not begin working toward achieving your goal sooner than later? The earlier you start, the quicker to the finish line, and the less of a load you'll have to worry about later on. For example, let's say part of your diet includes hitting the gym three times a week. If you schedule your workouts for the early part of the week -- say, Monday through Thursday -- that leaves the weekend for other items on your to-do list, from bills to laundry. Human beings are especially reluctant to do thi...

So sick of Trump! Who's with me?

I am so sick and tired of this blowhard. This egomaniac. This pathological liar. And it has nothing to do with his positions on the issues that matter most to the American people, from the economy to foreign affairs, which he fails to elaborate on regardless. I've just grown weary of seeing and hearing him every time I tune into Fox News, MSNBC, CNN, and virtually every other news outlet. These stations are having a field day with this guy. They're ostensibly willing to give him all the exposure he craves in return for a ratings boost. He's nothing short of ubiquitous. They mention him on everything from awards shows like The Oscars to Saturday Night Live. And more likely than not, you've heard someone at work or at the local grocery store chatting about Trump. If we're sick of him now, the thought of seeing him in the Oval Office for four long years no doubt sends chills down our spine. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I've never seen the medi...

Accept what you can't change

Many people tell me that they wish they could change certain aspects of their lives. To be sure, some of them are fully in their control, like finding a better job or losing weight. It takes hard work and persistence to achieve these goals, but they're certainly not impossible. What is outside their grasp, however, is the behavior of other people. It's this that seems to make them more despondent than anything else.  You may have tried your hardest to change your partner for the better -- say, to be more helpful around the house -- to no avail. You might be pushing your friend to hang out with you more often, but she seems to have time for everything and everyone except you.  We've all been there. As long as you've done your part and expressed how you feel, there's no reason to feel dispirited over that which you cannot change. We can't will others' behavior to be how we like. People will always do things that will upset us. Unfortunately...

Need advice? Contact me!

I've had several readers on this blog message me seeking everything from relationship advice to tips on how they can save money. They've later thanked me for pulling them out of a dark place. These are the kinds of topics I base my posts on, and I'm thrilled that my readers wish to reach out to me for a heart-to-heart. I realize some of you are facing tough challenges in your life, and that having a shoulder to lean on can make the difference between aspiring toward a better tomorrow and falling into a deep depression. That's why I'm here. Whether you're having marital issues or dealing with problems at work, please feel free to send me a message. I'll do my best to respond promptly, and rest assured that all details you provide will be held in the strictest confidence. Don't be shy. Don't suffer in silence. I'm here to help you! For advice, you can reach me at: E-Mail: JeffM8519@aol.com Google+:   https://plus.google.com/11353592724...

The secret to appreciating things and people

The way to truly appreciate the things and people in your life is to imagine yourself without them. Put yourself (mentally) in a position of losing something or someone dear to you, and you'll quickly assign said object more value. Picture yourself without one or all of these: Your ability to see, hear, speak, or walk Your partner, parent, or close friend A pet you've had in the family for several years Your home or car Many people fail to consider that there are those who would give anything to have what they take for granted. They're instead focused solely on what they don't have, whether it's a better car or a bigger house. Unfortunately, it hits people many of us once it's too late -- once a loved one dies or another unexpected event transpires. Several people have told me that such an exercise really puts things in perspective and makes them less likely to take their blessings for granted in the future. I invite you to try it out and discuss ...

Kim Kardashian West: ANOTHER naked selfie?

Say it ain't so! It's flabbergasting how Kim Kardashian West's hijinks pass for news these days. Just yesterday, she tweeted a photo of herself in front of a mirror with no clothes on. A couple of black rectangles cover her privates, but other than that, little is left to the imagination. The photo was retweeted a whopping 15,000 times in the first two hours after she shared it. One can presume that, at this point, not too many people on the internet haven't seen or heard about the controversial picture. Can you imagine the backlash such a photo would have drawn, say, two or three decades ago? Apparently, baring it all is in style now even if you don't pose for Playboy. (Check that -- I just remembered that she posed for Playboy, too.) The internet -- and, more specifically, social media -- has made it simpler than ever to put out racy pictures and generate massive buzz. I've said it before: We're living in an age where people are far more like...

When someone DOUBTS you...

When someone casts doubt on you and your ability to achieve a goal -- especially a far-fetched one -- how should you react? Should you hurl obscenities at them? Stoop down to their level and discredit their own goals or accomplishments? Absolutely not. The best course of action is to work harder than ever to achieve that goal -- and prove them wrong.  Over the years, people have doubted my ability to do everything from lose 30 pounds over the summer to land jobs for which there have been over 100 applicants. There's nothing sweeter than proving wrong those who write you off. And why would they? We can achieve anything we set our hearts and minds to. The naysayers are likely those who doubt their own ability to accomplish whatever goal you've set out to achieve, as well as their personal goals. They're simply projecting their own lack of self-confidence to you. Never stand for such behavior. If these individuals claim to be your friends, perhaps you ought to thin...

This Day in History: 1820

On March 6, 1820, President James Monroe signed the Missouri Compromise (also called the Compromise Bill of 1820) into law. The bill sought to make even the number of slave-holding states and free states in the nascent nation. It allowed Missouri to enter the Union as a slave state while Maine joined as a free state. What's more, the bill prohibited portions of the Louisiana Purchase territory north of the 36-degrees-30-minutes latitude line from engaging in slavery. Monroe, who was born into the Virginia slave-holding planter class, strongly supported states’ rights, but let Congress bicker over the issue of slavery in the new territories. He then closely examined any proposed legislation for its constitutionality. Although he realized that slavery ran contrary to the values written into the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, he, like fellow Virginians Thomas Jefferson and James Madison, feared abolition would rip apart the country they had fought so hard to crea...

Which of these annoys you more?

Does it annoy you when someone in front of you walks at a snail's pace? How about when you're walking down the stairs and could hear someone on a floor above literally running down the stairs, making you feel as if he'll eventually trample over you? Both annoy me to no end. The former is especially irritating when it's a group of people walking slowly, as it makes it even harder to wriggle ahead of them. You would think that by politely saying "excuse me," they'd get the point and out of the way. Unfortunately, this doesn't always work. People either ignore you, or are too immersed in conversation to attend to you. As for the latter, once the person catches up to me, I immediately put on the brakes and let him pass. Feeling as if someone is running behind me full-speed is just unnerving. You wonder, "Who the hell is that?" "Is it Brian in accounting, or a thief trying to make off with 30 grand?" Similar situations often play...

This Day in History: March 4

On this day in 1933, Franklin Delano Roosevelt was inaugurated as the 32nd president of the United States. His inaugural address included what arguably became his most famous words: "Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself." He had defeated Republican candidate Herbert Hoover, whom many blamed for the Great Depression, handily. It would be the first of an unprecedented four terms in office for the charismatic Roosevelt. (He died before he could complete his fourth.) No president before him served more than two terms, and none would do so afterward following passage of the 22nd amendment to the Constitution. With his wide-ranging spate of "New Deal" legislation, Roosevelt guided the country through the worst economic downturn in the country's history. His leadership also helped the United States and the Allies achieve victory over the Axis powers in World War II. Franklin Roosevelt was the fifth cousin of Theodore Roo...

Stripper refuses paid sex...but it gets better

After a stripper refused paid sex at a strip club in Florida, the unsatisfied customer demanded that she be arrested. I won't bore you with the details, but he paid her $300 expecting far more than she was willing to give. When she made it clear she wasn't going to budge, he demanded his money back, but the stripper refused to give in. A police officer eventually stepped in, and the customer finally stormed off thereafter. It's really a shame how so many women have to resort to such a lifestyle in order to pay the bills. My friends took me to a strip club for my bachelor party two years ago. Frankly, I felt uncomfortable the whole time I was there, and I felt especially bad for the strippers. The looks on their faces clearly conveyed that they didn't want to be there. They likely feel ashamed having to throw themselves at the beer-guzzling patrons day in and day out. Why they remain there is anyone's guess, but I hope that these women see and are aiming toward...

No, opposites do NOT attract

Contrary to popular opinion, opposites do not attract. Studies have proven that the reverse is true: the more two people are alike, the better the chemistry. That's not to say that people can't have dissimilarities. We should all have interests, values, and beliefs that distinguish us from our partner. A relationship in which both people are almost exactly alike leaves little to the imagination and is unlikely to sustain both partners' interest over the long haul. We should each bring something different to the relationship. There's nothing wrong with challenging and learning from one another. However, your interests and beliefs shouldn't diverge to the point where you're both arguing and trying to one-up each other constantly. There are simply some cases where saying it isn't a match made in heaven is an understatement: An atheist and a devout Christian A hardcore liberal and a staunch conservative  A chronic slob and an obsessive neat freak A p...

Are memories of our experiences always accurate?

I took a trip to Walt Disney World with my wife in December. While we certainly had fun seeing shows and going on rides -- and the fact the parks were decorated for Christmas added to the excitement -- I did complain about certain things. We got heavy traffic on the way there and coming back. The parks were so crowded that we felt like sardines packed in a tin. And despite getting Fast Passes, the wait times for many of the rides were longer than expected. It's been over two months since the trip, and I find myself fondly reminiscing about it. Isn't it funny how we tend to reflect on things through rose-colored glasses? It's as if the mind shuts out the negative bits (e.g., traffic and heavy crowds) and focuses only on the positive aspects (e.g., rides, fireworks, and Mickey Mouse). I suppose it's our way of trying to see the glass as half full. Generally, we make a conscious effort to block out all negative thoughts, feelings, and experiences that may in turn l...

This Day in History: Fun Fact

On this day in 1781, the Articles of Confederation were finally ratified. The Articles were signed by Congress and sent to the individual states for ratification on November 15, 1777, following 16 months of debate. Squabbles over land claims between Maryland and Virginia delayed final ratification for nearly four more years. Maryland finally approved the Articles on March 1, 1781, affirming the Articles as the outline of the official government of the United States. The Articles of Confederation guided the country until the implementation of the current U.S. Constitution in 1789. Less than five years after the ratification of the Articles of Confederation, many Americans agreed that the system was inadequate to the task of governance, prompting them to peacefully overthrow their second government in just over 20 years. The contrast between a group of sovereign states forming a confederation and a federal government established by a sovereign people stood at the heart of debate as the...

It's not as BIG as you thought...

I'm talking about Subway's sandwiches, people! What'd you think I was referring to? Apparently, many of the "Footlong" sandwiches we've been eating at Subway may not be as long as promised. In 2013, an Australian teenager posted an image of his sandwich on Facebook that measured only 11 inches. It generated international media attention, with The New York Post writing that four out of seven Footlongs it bought in New York measured only 11 or 11.5 inches. A class-action suit was filed against Subway thereafter. A judge last week granted final approval to a settlement of the suit. As part of the settlement, Subway agreed to take steps to ensure its bread is at least 12 inches long, with franchisees now required to use a tool for measuring bread. I'm glad Subway was busted. We work too hard for our money to be stiffed. Any company that tries to cut corners and mislead consumers in any way should be dealt with appropriately. In this case, no monetary...