It can be, at least in certain situations. Here's my take: I feel I get to know someone better on a one-to-one basis. Adding a third person to the equation can change the dynamics of the encounter considerably. A third person brings their own opinions and idiosyncrasies into the mix, some of which you may not find agreeable. That's not to say that three or four close friends can't have a great night out. They certainly can. But when you're getting to know someone, bringing another person into the picture can hamper your ability to get to know him or her on a more personal level. This also happens when you already know the person and would rather talk about certain things you both like and typically talk about -- whether sports, the news, or celebrity gossip. I've found that when it's a party of two, both people open up in ways they wouldn't with other people around, or they just act differently. For example, when we first started dating, I ne...

Many of my friends have me give their resumes and cover letters a once-over before they apply for any job. You'd be amazed at how many glaring typos I find on the documents. It goes without saying that you must proofread your materials before sending them off . Use spell checker to find any spelling mistakes, then print the documents and scan them slowly. If you go too quickly, your eyes will assume everything is error-free -- after all, you've been working on them for quite a while. Have a more seasoned proofreader look over your stuff if need be. You might be asking yourself, "Why should I worry so much about spelling and grammar? I'm not applying for a writing position here!" Even if the actual position requires little to no writing, employers use resumes and cover letters to pre-screen candidates. If they're rife with errors, employers will infer that the candidate is not detail-oriented and will produce sloppy work while on the job. Thus, it s...

Back in the old days, people would communicate exclusively via written letters that often took weeks, if not months, to arrive. While letters are still used today -- mostly by companies wanting us to sign up for credit cards or enroll in some form of membership with them -- it's become somewhat outdated as far as communications between friends and family are concerned. And the same can be said for making phone calls. That's thanks largely to the advent and ubiquity of texting and social media. If you're like me, you probably receive congratulations for promotions and other achievements -- not to mention holiday and birthday wishes, condolences, and so forth -via text or Facebook, even from your closest friends. Sure, we all know a couple of people who might still call or pay a visit -- the "old school" set -- but it's become increasingly rare. There's no question that texting and social media are convenient (and fairly cheap) methods of staying...

When I consider my closest friendships, I always ask one thing:  Would we have clicked in the same way had we met a year later?  Five years later? Ten years after? Chances are, we would not. The reasons why we gel more with certain people are almost self-explanatory. In general, most of our friends are close to us in age. It's not at all surprising given we probably met them in school or doing some activity that people in our age bracket might enjoy. I met my closest friends in different stages of my life: one in elementary school, one in middle school, one in high school, one in college, and one at my second job out of college. Three of them are single guys with no kids, while the other two -- the best man at my wedding and a female coworker I recently addressed in a prior post -- are married with children. Can you guess which of these friends I see and talk to more? Indeed, my friendships with these two latter friends has changed drastically since they became p...

Friendships usually change a great deal when one or both people get into relationships . In a way, this is to be expected. People get busier and tend to put their significant before anyone else. And once kids come along, this is only magnified tenfold. The most noticeable shift is that face time with the friend becomes very hard to come by. In most cases, the friends still manage keep in touch via text, email, or Facebook, but plans made with partners now preclude outings to the movies, concerts, and elsewhere that the friends used to make at the drop of the hat. That's not to say that seeing each other becomes impossible once one or both friends are in a relationship, but it takes more effort and planning. Obviously, any proposed plans with friends now have to be run by the significant other, who may or may not be on board. That was never an issue when the friends were both single. A great example of this is my friendship with an ex co-worker of mine, Elizabeth. During t...

Happiness is a decision.  It's a choice. It's a state of mind. You are as happy as you choose to be. The happiness ball is in your court, always. Life isn't about what happens to you, but what you do in response to what happens to you . You can either choose to sulk and let negative thoughts and feelings get the best of you, or you can look on the bright side and say, "Hey, things could be worse. Compared to what others are going through, this isn't that big of a deal." That kind of mindset can go a long way toward improving your mood and helping you appreciate what you have. Many people feel most unhappy when they compare themselves to others. But why in the world would someone do this to themselves? Other people are not you . Chances are, they don't share the same upbringing, like all the same things, or aspire to the same career goals as you. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to be more like other people. To do things as they do th...

Several of my high school colleagues are popping out babies as if it were a competition. Even a good number of my co-workers have a bun in the oven. I've never seen so many pregnant women at the same time. There must be something in the water! This is in stark contrast to all the reports I come across about the birthrate going down and how people are waiting longer to start a family. My wife and I definitely fall into such a group. We want to spend a couple more years traveling and enjoying our marriage before we contemplate having one of our own. Indeed, having kids is a life changer, and for the time being at least, we're trying to make the most out of living sans children. A friend and ex co-worker of mine, who had her daughter 14 months ago, told me a few weeks back that raising a child is far more taxing than she'd ever imagined. To my surprise, she sent me a text about two weeks ago inviting me to yet another baby shower -- this time for a boy that's due ...

"Have it your way" was Burger King's slogan for 40 years. The thrust was that consumers could customize their burger any way they wished -- without cheese, with extra pickles, and so forth. I always thought the slogan could be adapted to construct a very powerful inspirational quote -- by changing the first two words to "live life." Thus, "live life your way." That's the motto I feel we should all live by. Dress as you wish. Pursue a career in the field of your choice. Savor the hobbies that make you feel alive. Live your life by your own terms. As I've stressed in several posts, I am ardently opposed to following the herd. Life is too short to try to appease everybody. You'll always disappoint someone. You'll always fall short of someone's expectations.  What's really the point of trying to do things to others' liking? You never know if that relationship will end tomorrow.  We should all embrace our Go...

It's a topic I broached in an earlier post this week regarding kids returning to school: TRAFFIC. The time spent stuck in traffic is time you'll never get back -- ever. Whether you drive through a school zone on the way to work or are delayed by an accident or two, traffic congestion can be anathema to even the most patient drivers. Once our commute approaches or exceeds an hour, it really starts to grate on us, especially if it's something we grapple with several times a week. It makes us more irritable and tired, often leaving us feeling awfully achy. For example, many people who spend inordinate amounts of time behind the wheel complain of chronic back pain, headaches, and other health issues. Worst of all is the fact that long commutes cut into the time we can be spending doing other things -- hanging out with friends or family, putting in a workout at the gym, sleeping, watching TV, etc. As I noted in my post on back-to-school traffic, I read while waiting ...