How to Read People

Whether it's a meddlesome neighbor, snoopy coworker, or intrusive relative, we all know someone who can't seem to mind his or her business. Nosy people are everywhere. The question is: Why are people this way? Many people find their lives are relatively uneventful, and so they like to pry into the affairs of others. Further, others do it as a way of assessing how fulfilling or exciting their own lives are by comparison. I've come across a host of people -- particularly coworkers -- who love asking about my life, but volunteer very little information on theirs. In such situations, you have two options: either change the subject as if to suggest that you'd rather not disclose those details, or ask the same questions of the other person in kind. I find it hypocritical for people to go fishing for information on others while staying mum about their personal lives. Those who do this ought to find better things to do with their time!

As the world becomes more and more technologically advanced, it seems many people have only become lazier. A self-admitted history nerd, I always wonder what people did in, say, the 1800s for leisure and entertainment. It seems they made a pastime of reading books and writing letters to each other, among other activities. In this age of social media, texting, and email, how many people nowadays still write letters to each other by hand? Whereas I am a voracious reader, most of my friends wouldn't be caught dead with a book in hand. Instead, they seem to be glued to their trusty TVs, Netflix and Amazon Prime being all the rage these days. Writing letters and reading books are, in most people's minds, the kinds of activities you have to seek out and feel inspired to do -- which at the end of the day can use up more of their mental resources (or so they feel). On the other hand, TV programming comes at you -- you need not do much other than grab the remote control and su...

There's a raging debate as to whether men and women can have platonic relationships. Some people respond with an adamant no, claiming that members of the opposite sex use "friendship" to mask hidden feelings of attraction toward one another. Others vehemently assert that, yes, men and women can in fact maintain a friendly bond without there being any romantic strings attached. I'm in the latter camp, and here's why: I am friends with a wide range of women whom I hold absolutely no romantic feelings for. Though looks certainly aren't everything, physical attraction plays a role in the early stages of courtship. Many of these female friends have radiant personalities that many men would indeed be drawn to; however, they're just not my type physically. Or, it could be the other way around. I may find her physically attractive, but we're simply too far apart when it comes to hobbies, priorities, or overall lifestyles. I think it's simply ab...

We all know at least one person (and it could be ourselves) who is prone to frivolous spending. He or she forks over hundreds of dollars during each visit to a mall or restaurant, adding to an already massive heap of credit card debt. What's worse, the person makes a habit of asking friends or relatives for money. What, then, causes this seemingly uncontrollable compulsion to spend? For a lot of us, it's tied to our self-image and self-esteem. Many people depend on shopping and consumer products for a "pick-me-up" -- much like getting their afternoon coffee fix. Consumers use material possessions to enhance their image -- walking around with that Coach purse or in those Jimmy Choos can greatly boost feelings of self-worth and self-confidence. There's nothing wrong with this if done in moderation -- we all deserve to spoil ourselves every once in a while. But once wasteful spending becomes a weekly -- let alone daily -- occurrence, it creates the potential fo...

As I have alluded to in other posts, happiness is largely a matter of perspective. If you focus only on all the things you don't have or want to have, you might very well be miserable. If, rather than comparing your lifestyle to that of millionaires driving Ferraris and sporting expensive jewelry, you use the less fortunate as a basis for comparison, you'll feel more grateful for the things you do have and suddenly feel happier about your lot in life. One mistake people make is relying solely on external sources to be happy--whether it be their jobs, friends, or material possessions. I'm not saying we can't derive any happiness from these -- we all do to some degree. But in reality, happiness has to come from within. Happiness is by and large subjective. Your idea of happiness might be to go and get wasted every weekend, never get married, and ride around in a Harley. Mine may be to stay at home with my wife watching movies, writing, and reading books. My version ...