Something BOTH genders desire (not just women)

If you've watched your fair share of romantic movies or devoured a romance novel or two, this scene may be all too familiar to you by now: The handsome male lead doing everything in his power to sweep his love interest off her feet -- writing her poems, buying her chocolates, planting a kiss at the end of the night.

And even if the pair are already in a relationship together, it's the man who tends to be portrayed as the one responsible for making his partner feel beautiful and valued.

While it's certainly true that a guy should strive to make his lady feel appreciated, it goes the other way as well.

Men may not show it, but they, too, yearn to feel desired, to feel needed. They love receiving compliments, being told they're attractive, and being chased by their significant other every now and then.

This, of course, extends to the bedroom. Men like for their partner to initiate and take control when least expected.

But even so small a gesture as a call or text to tell a guy you've been thinking about him and that you enjoyed your date the other night can make him feel like a million bucks.

Many men are taught not to express their emotions, not to betray the slightest hint that they long for their partner to acknowledge their best attributes, whether physical or otherwise.

A man, they've ingrained in their minds, ought to be strong, able to carry on just fine whether his partner throws him a bone or not.

This is a wrong-headed approach.

Men and women both deserve to feel valued; each ought to speak up whenever they feel the other fails to see their worth.

Hopefully, that will give the other person a wake-up call, making them realize that taking their partner for granted just isn't going to fly.

If it doesn't, the relationship will begin to crumble until the individual who feels unacknowledged decides it's time to hit the road.

Now, wanting one's partner to make them feel appreciated is not the same as neediness, as fishing for validation. If you're pressing your partner to tell you you're beautiful, say, three or more times a day, there may be underlying self-esteem or insecurity issues that need to be addressed.

Men, by and large, have no problem being the ones to get the ball rolling most of the time. But every now and then, a warm call, loving text, romantic card, passionate kiss, or sweet compliment initiated by their partner will not only melt his heart, but make him more inclined to continue buttering her up.

It's a win win.

Comments

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

The 1 good thing cheaters do for us

Nothing good could come of a relationship marred by infidelity, right? The heartache, the shock, the feeling of one's trust being violated. In the short-term, being cheated on can turn one's world upside down. But eventually, there may be a light awaiting the cheated at the end of the tunnel. If you really think about it, cheaters end up doing us a huge favor. In their selfishness and disloyalty, they end up showing us that we deserve better. If you're so unfortunate as to be a victim of such acts of betrayal, you can only hope the cheater is considerate enough to own up to their missteps. But we all know full well that, in many cases, the cheater is either caught in the act or leaves behind a trail of hints that ultimately culminates in their undoing. The more classy thing to do is to discuss their feelings openly with their partner before straying. If all talks lead to an impasse or a further escalation of tensions, both parties should take it as a ...

Search This Blog