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Relationships fail when this happens


Relationships go belly-up when partners expect them -- and, more specifically, their significant other -- to be perfect. 

Many fall into the trap of setting unrealistically high standards for their partner, finding themselves crestfallen when they realize or she doesn't quite measure up.  

If you seek perfection, I'm here to tell you that you'll never find it.

There will always be qualities inherent in one's nature that won't go over well with others. Some people are exceedingly meek, while others are overly pompous. Certain individuals are unambitious while others can't seem to put their work down. Whether these are seen as positive traits or negative ones really varies by person. 

Sure, it doesn't mean we can't work toward making the relationship as strong as it can possibly be by addressing our flaws, listening to our partner's grievances, and withholding the compulsion to finger-point and pass judgment. 

But a relationship should never be regarded as a cure-all to life's problems, nor should a partner be seen as an elixir for our deepest fears and worries. Instead, a relationship is a life enhancer, with a partner supporting your goals and helping to bring out the very best in you. 

Happiness will forever elude us unless we look for it within ourselves. Let's face it: The relationship can end tomorrow for whatever reason, but as long as you don't perceive your happiness as being inextricably linked to it, you'll bounce back quicker than you think. 

Humility -- accepting that one is fallible and does not hold all the answers -- is vital to the life of any relationship. If either individual inhibits the other's voice, it'll build resentment, causing the aggrieved partner to fume, distance themselves, or, in the worst-case scenario, cheat. 

Rather than constantly looking for the ideal partner, focus instead on having someone who's goals, values, and interests complement your own, even if you may not always agree on everything. 

And, if you're single, don't stress yourself out over finding a significant other. When the time is right, he or she will enter your life and amplify the happiness you already enjoy on your own. Until then, immerse yourself in the hobbies and causes that inspire you to get out of bed in the morning. 

In closing, perhaps it's time for people to reevaluate what happiness ultimately means to them. If they insist that their partner satisfy set criteria -- a certain salary, a particular body type, a given set of personality attributes -- they should think seriously about fine-tuning their expectations. 
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