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Here's what causes us to be unhappy

A lot of people think unhappiness stems only from things that happen to us.

In reality, though, unhappiness comes not from external events, but from our internal response to those events.

That explains why we may grow bored of jobs of relationships we once found exciting. While a raise at work or bouquet of flowers from our partner may have been sufficient at one point to bring us ample joy, that may not be the case any longer.

It's not the event itself -- but the way we react to it -- that predicts how happy or unhappy we'll be.

Let me give you another example. Have you noticed how some people might laugh at a joke, while others take it out of context and end up angry as a result?

A job that one person might find fulfilling can get on someone else's nerves. The same goes for relationships. As the saying goes, one man's trash is another man's treasure.

It's not the job or relationship that causes us to be unhappy. It's the way we react to and perceive it. You could say you loathe your job one minute and later tell yourself it isn't that bad after seeing a news report on the high number of job seekers still looking for work in your industry.

While some people are prone to get angry if something doesn't turn out their way, others are more likely to accept and rationalize the outcome as likely being better in the long run ("that job wasn't right for me anyway").

Indeed, life is ostensibly more about what we do with what happens to us than what actually happens to us.

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