Skip to main content

When do you know it's time to kiss a friendship goodbye?

The last 11 or so months have been quite eventful to say the least. My wife and I got married, went on our honeymoon (our first time traveling by plane and outside our home state), and we recently bought a condo.

While it's certainly been an exciting period in my life, it's also been the most stressful by far. I find myself edgier than ever. Closing on the condo took a lot longer than we expected and was mentally, physically, and emotionally draining.

I don't know if it's any coincidence that within the 11-month span we've been married, I've gotten into heated arguments with my 3 closest friends, all of whom I've known for 15 or more years. It seems the arguments have debilitated the friendships to such a degree that I doubt all 3 will survive.

I guess when you're under a lot of stress, it's not as easy to hold your emotions in check. The other contributing factor may be that I no longer have a lot in common with any of the three. While I recently got married and have no kids, two of the guys don't even have girlfriends, and the other is married but with 2 kids.

We've had spats in the past, but now that I'm married, it just feels different. I recognize that perhaps these friendships have run their course and that trying to keep them humming is an exercise in futility.

I feel that I am ready to let go if that's what is meant to be. I firmly believe people come into your life to serve a certain purpose. Once that has been accomplished, it is time to soldier on.

I care about these guys, but I am finding it harder to relate to them these days. I just finished having a heated argument with one who hung up in my face because he took offense to something I said. It wasn't the first time he has hung up in my face, though. I forgave him for doing it the first time about 2 years ago, but I refuse to be disrespected that way more than once. He and I are on thin ice, and even if he apologizes, I may not accept it.

I guess my wife and I are better off hanging out with people in the same life stage as us -- those who are married with no kids.

Do friendships begin to crumble once you're married?


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Women vs. Men: Who likes to backstab more?

Whether it's on TV or in the workplace, the general consensus seems to be that women gossip, backstab, and stir up more conflict than men do. But, as with every other topic, I thought it only fair to put this so-called stereotype under the microscope. If you watch reality shows like Celebrity Apprentice, you'll notice it's the women who spend far more time bickering. While the men do at times become embroiled in tit for tat, it's the women who are portrayed as meaner and more hostile. In the workplace, I have noticed that women seem to gossip far more than their male counterparts. I haven't really seen any cases where a person blatantly backstabs the other, but I have caught both men and women in little white lies. If it is true that women are generally more into backstabbing and gossiping than men, why is this the case? I believe that it isn't fair to make a blanket statement like "all women play these games while all men keep to themselves and pre...
1 comment
Read More

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...
6 comments
Read More

Haunted Hotel: The Admiral Fell Inn

Given that I've worked in the hotel/lodging industry for over 6 years now, I enjoy studying up and learning about hotels around the world, especially those classified as historic and/or haunted. (I am, after all, a history junkie!) I thought it'd be fun to spotlight various historic hotels over the next few weeks as we draw closer to Halloween. We begin this spooktacular series on historic hotels with the Admiral Fell Inn , which is located in Baltimore, Maryland. The Fell family, Quakers from Lancaster, England, founded Fell's Point in 1730, and developed it into a shipbuilding center and busy deep-water seaport for exporting and importing. Throughout the 18th and 19th centuries, Fell's Point was humming with exports of Maryland tobacco and grain and imports from Europe and the West Indies. By 1900, Fell's Point had devolved into a cesspool of debauchery and drunkenness known for its crime-ridden saloons and brothels. In response, the Port Mission Women...
2 comments
Read More