Relationship Advice: Don't stress over what you can't control

"My best friend has pulled away and it's tearing me apart."

"After addressing how I feel in a respectful manner, my boyfriend continues to act aloof with me."

I've found myself and some of my friends issue the above complaints on several occasions over the years.

The thing we have to keep in mind is this: We can't read people's thoughts or control their behavior. You'll drive yourself batty mulling over why people act a certain way -- why they can't just act like the friend or partner you've come to love.

If, after bringing it to their attention, they continue to behave in ways that hurt or upset you, you have two options: (1) Back off and let them sort out their feelings (2) End the friendship or relationship once and for all

The only constant in life is change, especially when it concerns human beings. As I've noted in earlier posts, life circumstances, conflicting schedules, and diverging interests cause people to drift apart. If both parties don't put effort into keeping the relationship or friendship fresh and exciting, it'll eventually fray.

But you shouldn't feel as though you have to pester the other person to do his part. If they seem indifferent, cut them loose, as hard as it may be at first. By cutting stale relationships from your life, you make room for new ones.

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