Do single friends distance themselves from married ones, or vice-versa?

They say that many people who enter relationships or get married soon forget their friends exist.

If this the rule, I am most definitely the exception. I'm married now, but even when my now-wife and I were dating, we would extend invitations to close friends to go with us to the movies, restaurants, and other places of interest.

Even after being married for six months, I continue making an effort to schedule outings with friends. Ironically, some of them seem less interested in hanging out now that I'm married.

Wait a second. Isn't it supposed to be the other way around? I thought married folks were the ones who suddenly became too busy for friends?

Well, it goes to show you that in the realm of friendships, nothing is that clear-cut. I've always made a conscious effort to reserve time in my schedule for my friends. But I sense that once you get married, single friends assume you're busier and are reluctant to "impose" by proposing an outing. They may be thinking that now it would require sign-off from the friend and the spouse, so they don't bother.

Some friends might also prefer to give you your space and seek different pursuits with other single friends. They are likely to assume that you're no longer interested in doing things you would do together before the wedding (go drinking, hit the gym, go on road trips, etc.)

If you sense your friend being aloof post- wedding, have a talk with him or her. Let your buddy know you can still carve out time in your schedule -- albeit not as much -- for the two of you to hang out. If your friend doesn't seem enthused, it's up to you to assess whether it's time to kiss the friendship goodbye.

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