Don't rely TOO much on friends

While we can say that our closest friends are usually reliable, we should refrain from depending on them all the time.

Unfortunately, even they can let us down every once in a while.

I'm sure you have at least one who comes to you in times of need, but seemingly vanishes when he or she no longer needs you. Then, when you try arranging outings with the person or need a favor, they're always busy.

It really grates on me when friends act this way. Truthfully, those you call true friends should not be so flaky.

A friendship is a two-way street. When only one person shows interest, it makes the other person feels as though they're being taken for granted.

I don't care how busy you are. When you value someone else's company, you find a way to make time for them, even if it's a quick lunch or jog around a nearby park.

Some people are all about give and take. Little do they realize that in order for a friendship to remain strong, there has to be reciprocation -- a sense of "we scratch each other's backs."

Life gets in the way sometimes, so it's understandable if a friend can't be there every single time you need them. But if leaving you hanging becomes the rule rather than the exception, it raises a big question: Does the person truly value the friendship?

We try to give our buddies the benefit of the doubt, especially those we've known for a long time. But if you start to feel like your good nature is being exploited, you should put a stop to it immediately. And if your friend refuses to change his or her ways for the betterment of the friendship, do yourself a favor and nix the friendship once and for all. You can find better friends than that.

Even our closest friends may not always meet our expectations. We might assume they'll think or act a certain way in a given situation, and it turns out they prove us wrong.

That's why you shouldn't become overly reliant on any one friend. Sooner or later, every friend you have will disappoint you. Whether you want the friendship to continue after that is all up to you.

Comments

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca...

How To Understand People

Search This Blog