Don't be FOOLED by slick people

Have you ever met a person who possesses enough charm and wit to win someone over in a matter of seconds?

It can be anyone from the affable car salesman at the local dealer to a gregarious classmate to the amicable hiring manager you meet with for a job interview.

Many people with sharp people skills are quick to employ them in order to get something they want, whether it's a sale or date.

In psychology, the mere exposure effect is a phenomenon whereby people tend to develop a preference for something merely because they are familiar with them. In other words, familiarity breeds likeability.

That's why, contrary to popular belief, things like follow-up calls and thank you letters can have a powerful effect so long as the individual made a great first impression.

What's more, they will do little things to further build rapport, from pretending to agree with you on a wide range of issues (when deep down they diverge with you on many of them) to making it seem they share several of your interests.

For example, I remember interviewing for a job where I asked the hiring manager if he liked sports. He gave me an emphatic "yes" and mentioned the names of local teams he supposedly rooted for.

I wound up accepting an offer from them. It didn't take long for me to discover that the guy was clueless when it came to sports. It was obvious he lied to woo me, and I'll be honest: it worked.

Many highly sociable and confident people are adept at putting on a facade and deceiving others to achieve their ends. They get in others' good graces by engaging them in conversation and heaping compliments on them.

They pull the right strings to curry people's favor, and once they get what they desire, they cease contact. A perfect example: Men who fake wanting a serious relationship in order to get a woman in bed, then disappear.

Don't invest your emotions in any one friendship or relationship until the person has proven they're worthy of your trust. Keep your guard down until the time is right.

Observe how they behave around others. Do they seem like they're out to flatter everyone, but you can't quite put a finger on why? Have they been caught lying before? If so, it should raise a few red flags.
You definitely want to stay away from such disingenuous opportunists.

Remember, even a master at deception can't hoodwink a keen observer of human behavior!

Comments

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