Close to two years ago, a movie called "Don Jon," starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Scarlett Johansson, and Julianne Moore, hit theaters. Johansson, who plays Levitt's girlfriend in the movie, walks in on him one day as he's watching and masturbating to an adult film. That act alone caused the wheels of the relationship to fall off, and Levitt's character ends up finding a much more understanding partner in Moore, who doesn't seem to mind his habit as much.
The movie perfectly captures how some women may bristle at the thought or sight of their partners watching porn, while others may find it perfectly acceptable.
The first group of women may contend that a guy needn't look at porn when he has a woman -- and a good one at that -- in his life. She may eventually sense that, because he finds pleasure in seeing other women naked, he must either be cheating or just isn't satisfied with her -- and, by extension, their sex life. Scarlett Johansson's character in the movie was of this mindset.
The second camp is less apt to take it so personally. They reason that a guy has his needs, and they might not always be around to meet them. Thus, they give their partners a little more leeway to release tension when the circumstances call for it. In fact, these women may even be avid porn watchers themselves. Such was the case with Julianne Moore's character in the movie.
Here's my take on this: I don't think a guy who watches porn is either right or wrong in doing so. However, he is in the wrong if, early in the relationship, he assures his partner that he doesn't watch porn, but proceeds to do it behind closed doors. That, my friends, is being dishonest.
If a man watches pornography and wishes to carry on with the habit even while he's in the relationship, I think he ought to be open about it. Trying to hide something from your partner can never lead to anything good. I don't blame Johansson's character for the way she reacted when she caught him in the act. He should have been upfront about it -- maybe not on their first date, but as soon as the two felt comfortable enough around each other to discuss matters of a sexual nature.
And if she feels she won't be able to tolerate it, he should move on and find someone who can (as Levitt did in the movie by hooking up with the character played by Moore). What one person might find acceptable, another will regard with contempt.
What's your opinion? Do you feel men should be open about their porn-viewing habits (if any) early into the relationship? Is not doing so, and later being caught in the act, grounds for a breakup?
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