This happens when you take back a cheater

It's hard to believe that some victims of infidelity find it in their hearts to forgive and give their cheating partner a second chance. Is it worth taking such a gamble? Let's dive in.

Taking back a significant other who's shown disloyalty to you can be a definite slippery slope. It's for this reason I would advise against making this move.

For one, who's to say they won't do it again?

You may think you can rebuild trust in them, but in all likelihood, you'll be increasingly tempted to check their texts or e-mails. Perhaps you might question when they come home late or why they're having lunch with a co-worker of the opposite sex. In other words, your insecurity switch gets turned on.

That's not to say that no one who's ever cheated has not been genuinely contrite for their mistakes or sincere in their effort to change their ways.

But let's be frank. By forgiving a cheater, you're essentially allowing them to have their cake and eat it too. They had a little fun on the side and still have their relationship with you to come home to? What luck!

In my estimation, if they genuinely cared, they would not so much as entertain the idea of straying, which would pose an immediate threat to your relationship.

As I've stressed before, cheaters are entitled to no passes -- none -- for their behavior. I don't care if you had too much to drink, your relationship is on the rocks, or the other man/woman seduced you first.

As soon as the mere thought of cheating creeps up, that's when the person has to question why -- and have a conversation with their partner before things really get out of hand.

Maybe it's a matter of opening the lines of communication and speaking honestly about your disenchantment. In fact, you may very well have valid arguments -- such as the fact that affection and intimacy from the other side have been sorely lacking -- and your significant other may concede as much.

And if they make no effort to change, I'll lead the charge in saying to dump them and pursue whoever else might strike your fancy.

But cheating on them is a coward's way out. It's selfish and completely inconsiderate of the partner's feelings (and children if any are involved).

At the end of the day, it's your choice whether to take back a cheating partner. I recommend against it because I feel that once trust has been butchered in that way, it can never be fixed. While the cheater may strike again, you will find yourself questioning their every move.

A relationship this fraught, in my view, just isn't worth it.

Comments

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