Why you should be thankful for toxic people in your life

It sounds counterintuitive, right?

As we approach Thanksgiving, we aim to be thankful for the wonderful folks in our lives The ones who are there for us when we need them. The ones who lift us when we hit rock bottom emotionally.

So you might be wondering why in the world I'm suggesting we should be grateful for the naysayers, the toxic folks, the unredeemable narcissists.

Well, if we didn't have people like this in our lives, we would never come to appreciate those who embody the exact opposite qualities -- decency, respect, humility, and integrity, among others.

That isn't to say that you should keep these folks in your life unnecessarily.

Sometimes we need to put up with them for a job (the tyrannical boss) or for someone else's sake (the meddling in-laws).

But when someone is that unpleasant, it's easy to draw a contrast between them and the individuals you've come to respect and admire, e.g., sweet Sue in human resources or your boyfriend's caring cousin.

If you've had a toxic partner, it can feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted when the next person who comes along turns out to be a total sweetheart.

The same goes for relishing an old friend whom we may have taken for granted while investing time in a different friendship that crashed and burned.

If there's anything that toxic people do, it's to help us shine a light on the folks who are truly deserving of our energy and attention.

But rather than striving to "change" a toxic person -- as so many of us do -- we're better off cultivating relationships with folks who see us as enhancing their lives just as much as they do ours.

Nobody wants a gossip or naysayer getting in their way. But at least their mere presence serves as a reminder that better people-- those who genuinely care for us -- exist.

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