Skip to main content

Do you have "convenience friendships"?

If you're like me and practically everyone else out there, you have at least one convenience friendship.

I've given the name "convenience friendships" to those in which one or both people are in them for their own convenience.

Now, some friendships don't start off as convenience friendships, but time, distance, and shifting priorities water them down to the point that both individuals may no longer identify with each other.

We all have that "friend" who calls when she wants a favor, but seems to vanish into thin air when she herself is needed. Some people like keeping certain friendships alive for the sole purpose of getting a ride or loan when the situation calls for it.

It's these kinds of people we must steer clear from!

Why be in a friendship with someone who manipulates you for their personal gain? Even if you were once great friends, it's not worth it to keep the person around on hopes she will morph back to the person she was before.

Let's face it: It's extremely difficult to get someone to change. If you detect that the friendship is no longer what it once was -- and that it's become little more than a convenience friendship -- you might be better off cutting him or her loose and going in search of new buddies.

I understand that sometimes a friendship of convenience can be mutually beneficial. For example, your friend, a plumber by trade, might be your go-to guy every time you have a leaky faucet, and he might seek your help for assistance with, say, resume writing.

If both people are content with such an arrangement, then I say go for it. It's only when one person might want something more substantive out of the friendship that problems could be on the horizon.

Do you have any convenience friendships? Why or why not?






Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Women vs. Men: Who likes to backstab more?

Whether it's on TV or in the workplace, the general consensus seems to be that women gossip, backstab, and stir up more conflict than men do. But, as with every other topic, I thought it only fair to put this so-called stereotype under the microscope. If you watch reality shows like Celebrity Apprentice, you'll notice it's the women who spend far more time bickering. While the men do at times become embroiled in tit for tat, it's the women who are portrayed as meaner and more hostile. In the workplace, I have noticed that women seem to gossip far more than their male counterparts. I haven't really seen any cases where a person blatantly backstabs the other, but I have caught both men and women in little white lies. If it is true that women are generally more into backstabbing and gossiping than men, why is this the case? I believe that it isn't fair to make a blanket statement like "all women play these games while all men keep to themselves and pre...