Don't waste time on people who aren't worth it

Don't waste your time, energy, and brain cells on people who simply aren't worth it. Who cares that Sally from high school makes more money than you? Or that a neighbor you hardly even know has a better car? Or that several people you have on Facebook -- whom you barely ever speak to -- travel to Walt Disney World five times a year?

It's really a shame that, for so many people, life has become little more than a competition to best their peers. They can't help but assess how well they're doing in life by comparing themselves to other people -- people that may have completely different goals, interests, values, and personalities altogether.

As I've noted in prior posts, sites like Facebook can bring out the worst in some people. It has evolved into a breeding ground for narcissism unlike anything I've seen before. Selfies, gloating about eating at the hottest restaurant in town, pictures galore while on vacation in the Bahamas. It's become more about showing off than sharing.

Whether you want to be married, make more money, have a bigger house, own a nicer car, or have ten diplomas hanging on your wall, do these things because YOU want to do them. Don't cave into social pressure. Don't try to emulate your friends or co-workers. Do things to better yourself independent of what everyone else is doing. Enhancing oneself shouldn't have any strings attached.

At the end of the day, these people are not paying your bills or donating their kidney for you. Why become so preoccupied with what others are doing? They have their own lives, ambitions, and problems. Focus on yours!

Think of it this way: These people aren't thinking about or worrying over you, so why should you waste mental resources on them? It's this kind of thinking that begets envy, resentment, depression, and other negative health outcomes.

Concentrate on your dreams -- your accomplishments. Maybe deep down you don't want to become a CEO like your friend Charles or own an expensive car like your cousin Jeremy. Perhaps you'd be content making $60,000 a year as a lower-level employee and driving a Nissan Altima.

Success means different things to different people. Some people care less about material things than others. There are those whose ultimate goal is to live a simpler life.

Rather than compare yourself to your peers, a better strategy is to compare yourself now to how you were a year ago and gauge how much you've accomplished since. Is your life what you want it to be? If not, take action -- starting today -- so that you can be one step closer to making those things a reality.

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca...

How To Understand People

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